let's get it on!
All that silly thoughts within me

i have moved! (due to the screwed up network of pitas.bah)

Anws. heres the new websitey!


see ya guys there!

Saturday, April 22, 2006 06:28 p.m.

I hope it RAINS in Singapore!
OMMFG. I just saw Rain on MTV!!!! HE IS DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN CUTE!!!!! WAH LAU. Did I mention that I am damn damn fascinated by him? I can't emphasis this more enough!!!! ARGH. *melts* If he ever comes to Singapore, I am definitely going to watch him livE!!! And it will be right at the front where I can see him!!!! My oh my. I never ever go gaga over some artiste..but him...*melts* he is so unbelivably charming on stage that I can't help it!!! I like it when he smiles.....soooooo cute. Gosh. I am going to stay at home and cheong his vcds and performances right after my exams mans.Can't wait!!! It's raining, its raining its raining.....

Friday, April 21, 2006 01:03 p.m.

On cumbersome HTML and new goals.
Wah. I hate HTML. My photos aint coming up and my designs are screwed. Best thing is. I din even blardy change anything in my template and yet the pictures just disappeared overnite. WTF. Lousy piece of shit. And despite trying to fix it back, everything is not coming back. Argh. Why do I even bother saying all these. I am polluting my blog with this shit.

ANWS. I need a new goal in life!! I cant seem to motivate myself to do anything these days. Yeah, I am studying. Yeah, I am hanging out with my friends and having fun. Yeah, I am contented with my life right now. But there is that lil bit of thing missing in my life right now..wat issit? Dont tell me its a bf. Thats bullshit. haha. I think I just don't know what the hell I wanna do with my life. I have absolutely no goals or whatsoever to talk about and I have no direction in life. Argh. Everyone is advancing except for meee!!Boooo.

Thursday, April 20, 2006 05:50 p.m.

Bird nest Overload!
I am terribly touched. My dad came to my hall to deliver, get this, BIRD NEST to me!! And pretty big bottles sommore. Wah. Touched. Damn damn touched. When he came up, i suddenly realize that he has aged a lot. Could see all his wrinkle lines and his face showed signs of weariness. For once, I realized that my dad has worked so hard to keep this family going. Thats why I always say that I would wanna be his daughter in my next, next next, next next next life and many many next lives. But that means he would have to suffer for his next, next next, next next next life and many many next lives! HAHA. erps.

Tuesday, April 18, 2006 01:24 p.m.

I am beginning to like......
Accounting!! I hated it at first coz i thought there were tons of stuff to be learnt and they were totally un-interesting. But now, after studying for it, I feel that I am feeeeling it already haha. Which is good since that is my specialization. I really hope that I will be able to chalk up to a B coz a C on the report card is not very nice to look at after all wat hah. As for the rest of the subjects..well lets just say that I am hoping to smoke my way thru marketing, get lucky with financial management and get my A for stats.

WISH ME LUCK!! and of course, I will be nice and share a teeny weeny bit of my luck to others. haha.

Sunday, April 16, 2006 11:12 a.m.


我知道伤心不能改变什么 那么 让我诚实一点
诚实 难免有不能控制的宣泄
只要关上了门 不必理谁
一个人坐在空荡包厢里面 手机 让它休息一夜
难 像切歌切掉回忆的画面 眼泪不能流过十二点
生日快乐 我对自己说 蜡烛点了 寂寞亮了
生日快乐 泪也融了 我要谢谢你给的你拿走的一切
还爱你 带一点恨 还要时间 才能平衡
热恋伤痕 幻灭重生 祝我生日快乐
一个人坐在空荡包厢里面 手机 让它休息一夜
难 像切歌切掉回忆的画面 眼泪不能流过十二点
生日快乐 我对自己说 蜡烛点了 寂寞亮了
生日快乐 泪也融了 我要谢谢你给的你拿走的一切
还爱你 带一点恨 还要时间 才能平衡
热恋伤痕 幻灭重生 祝我生日快乐
还爱你 带一点恨 还要时间 才能平衡
热恋伤痕 幻灭重生 祝我生日快乐

Wah. I found this. And I think it says alot.

Saturday, April 15, 2006 08:57 p.m.

A final realisation
Perhaps its time for me to move on to the rest of the trees out there.

Saturday, April 15, 2006 08:38 p.m.

A love, A great love, A great great love
I saw this show on tv this morning about this chicken doo doo guy who dared not confess his love. So this other girl told him this,

" There are 3 kinds of love in this world. One is just a love, a love which u think u love her but actually u don't. Next is a great love, a love which will last for 2 years even after the girl rejects you. The last, which is the most fatal one, is a great great love, One which will change your life. So which one is yours?"

Hmm. Thought invoking. Made me think of a particular someone.

Saturday, April 15, 2006 03:05 p.m.

Bernard's 20th bdae!
haha here are the long awaited photos for bernard's bdae!! wheet!! 20 years old oreadi!! So olld...hahah here are some of the funnier ones!

It was supposed to be a flirtatious shot but wenhooi totally spoil it all with her guai guai look and sinhui look like she is going to vomit onto wenhooi any moment! Oh mans....haha

haha!! charb is looking like ah wang more and more..:)

haha bernard thought that this was his bdae pressie!! So silly. Why would we give him a pink shoe and sign on it somemore and expect him to wear it out?!! hhahaa ok actually he can. It looked like some autographed shoe hah! We lied to him that this was his bdae pressie and i could see him twitching slightly when we told him that.

And introducing.....*drumrolls* The photo of the night!!
Told bernard to peep at sinhui's butt secretly so that I can take a picture to make it look as if I caught him in action..In the end he looked up. *slaps forehead* Wah kaao. haha.

Now for take 2...

With artistic lighting and a lousy actor who was severely scolded for failing to look his part, we finally got it!

haha and lastly, a scary ghost picture!! WooooOOOoooooOOOOOoooooOOOOOooo.......

Friday, April 14, 2006 07:17 p.m.

An eventful thursday night.
This is bad. My accounting paper is on monday and I actually went out to eat after friendly at OFS yesterday night!! Terrible! BUt anyways, dinner was sucha hilarious affair that I couldnt bring myself to blame myself for going out to eat.

Rushed to meet zsing for dinner at wisma at arnd 9 plus and we decided to go to bugis to some lai lai place to eat instead. Anyways, the place was in Liang Seah street, and after checking the map we embarked on our journey to look for this eating place. Went past the temple at Waterloo street and so I decided to stop by and pray for good results outside the temple(coz it was closed). haha. OKOk, I know it IS abit ling shi bao fo jiao, but still!!! a slim chance is better than nothing. SO. After that we continued walking until we ended up opposite Nanayang Academy of Fine Arts where we finally decided that enough was enough and we were never going to find that blardy place. Called a cab and guess wat? We watied for 15 mins fot that cab coz the uncle went to the worng campus!!! Then when we went in, the uncle said in chinese," Wah...at first when I saw Liang Seah street, I thought this must be foreigners! Coz the place is so near here.."Me and zsing looked at each other then burst out laughing...Foreigners?!! Wahaha. That is too much man! Was quite embarrassed by that comment though. hah) Then he continued," You know when u say I went ot the wrong place I had to detour and the amount of petrol I spent is more than sending you 2 streets away to Liang Seah street!! I even went past that place can!" Again me and zsing started laughing. Haha seeee I was right! In the end, when the uncle stopped us at Liang Seah street, I almost died. I WENT TO THAT PLACE MANY TIMES CAN!!!! AND THE WORST THING AFTER WE FOUND THE PLACE WAS I ACTUALLY WENT IN THERE TO EAT!! TWICE!!!!!!Argh. Someone please shot us for our boo boo. We spent like 8 bucks taking cab 2 streets away (4 bucks for calling that stupid cab) and to find that I actually went there before!!! WAH LAU. I felt like slapping myself mans. Next time I better chekc out where the hell I am eating, street name and all, so that I will make such a silly mistake again! Hhaha. But ok lahs Zsing was nice enuff to treat me to the cab fare and dinner (which was awful btw and completed the list of "ten silly things to do in 2 hours")Felt abit bad for letting him treat even tho i treated him to desert but the desert was how cheap compared to the cab fare and dinner! haha Thanks Zsing! Dun worry, when I go thailand I will remember to buy something back for you!! :)

If you think that thats all, wait till you hear wat happened when we called for cab to go home! I called for 2 cabs under my name and when zsing got into the cab, guess what the cab uncle asked?

"Are you MISS QUEK?"

I almost dropped off my cab when he msged me abt that. like WTF?!!! hEEELOOOW uncle!!! He is a G-U-Y FOR GOODNESS SAKE!! even tho it is late and dark and all but u can stilll differentiate between a guy and girl wat!!! wah liew. *Faints* Taxi uncles are damn hilarious.

Friday, April 14, 2006 12:34 p.m.

Happy 15th birthday Teevee!
My teevee at home is 15 years old!!! Yeah u heard me! 15 looong loooooooooong years...Actually I suscpect that it is not his birthday today but since I realize that he has been with us for 15 years, I decided to give him a status and name him the 6th member of the Quek family!!! YAY! From my old house to my current one...15 years is damn long for a television man. Most relationships(Lovers, friends, dogs and owners etc) dun even last for 15 years can. And the best thing is he is still in a tip top condition! As good as when we first bought him! Woot! Haha. For that, I am going to sing him a birthday song! eh-hem!!!!! *clears throat, gurgles listerine*


Wednesday, April 12, 2006 07:42 p.m.

A wrong SMS.
How many times have u sent an SMS to the wrong person and realize after that that you actually sent it to the last person u ever wanted to know about that PARTICULAR message?Well I jsut almost did. To add on to the 1001 times that I have done in that past.Luckily I discovered it in time. If not, the consequences will be dire. HAHA. I Just subconsiously typed in the name of the subject of my message in the "recipients" box and realize that I wasnt going to send to HIM but to another person asking about HIM! So weird isn't it? WHAHA. This goes to show that the advance of technology is not always good coz it can force people to make the silliest of the silliest mistakes that one can ever make, not to mention that it is irreversible and can possibly change certain relationships. HAH. Chew on that.

i am so so so damn blardy sick of mugging for my exams!!! ARGH. I cringe at the word exams, accounting, stats, financial management, marketing these days. Not because I can't finish studying for it, but rather I am so tired of studying ANYTHING that I so wanna quit school now. It boring and bland and the only subject that I enjoy a lil more than the rest is marketing. But then, mugging for it is not as fun as doing projects, I am merely reading the marketing textbook, about marketing principles and obsolete examples. Needless to say, the rest of the subjects are worse, since I need to squeez every ounce of my brain juice in order to understand and know how to do the workings for them. DISGUSTING. Which brings me to another point.


I thought aboutit for quite long and I came up with the follwoing conclusion to justify my choice of course 1 year ago.

1) I didn't wanna do anything else and the something that I wanted to do ie. psychology in the states, I couldnt' get, so there was no second choice in the first place.

The first reason lead to the following reasons to explain why I chose this course out of the thousands of other courses out there.
2)Studying accountanct had good career prospects.

3)I can earn lotsa money in the near future.

And lastly, which is not one of those main reason, but rather a sub reason, but since I thought about it so I decided to write it down, is that I can possibly marry an Indonesian tycoon next time! haha. Then u will ask me, so why dun be an air stewardess working in the first class or business section of SIA then? More chances wat. HAH. U see, I wanted to have a lil career of my own also mahs. Not that being an air stewardess is no good, but I wanted something mroe out of my education I guess. I mean afterall, it is kinda wasted if I dun take on a professional degree if I can wat.

So yes, after staying in NTU for one year studying this course, i am kinda regretting it. Firstly, I am not the kinda person to do accountancy I think. I have minimal interest in it so far (which is kinda bad, I mean i HAVE spent like at least 5 months doing this course and if i still can't generate a lil more interest than wat I had when I first started out, then something is very wrong haha.) Secondly, I am kinda stressed out by this course since everyone is so competitive and if I go out there and work (assuming I can even find any accounting related job) I will be devoured by all the hungry lions and lioness out there. Thirdly, I will have to slog my guts out if I ever wanna move up the corporate ladder in this line coz everyone elase is so much more talented in this area of study than me.

BOO. I am damn resigned now.

Thursday, April 6, 2006 01:27 p.m.

An I -R-R-I-T-A-T-I-N-G Post


Anws, I shall stop doing that coz i am getting irritated myself too having to keep clicking on the hyphen button after every alphabet. DISGUSTING.ARGH. I just received the bad news from my elective lecturere today that our exam is going to be E-S-S-A-Y!!!! WAH LAU. Somebody pls save me. 3 blardy essay qn ok!!! WTF. And i thought that there would at least be some mcqs....Grrrr. Luckily I s/u it, if not I will prob get a C for it. haha.Disgusting. Sighs. I think the depression bug is getting to me. Or maybe I am just simply sick and tired from mugging for my exams. Well I guess it is not the exams since I am super not productive considering I only studied 2 chaps of stats today. WELL DONE. Sians. Its back to the books. YA-W-N...

Tuesday, April 4, 2006 07:03 p.m.

More of this and less of that
Ok, my accounting and marketing presentations are finally over. So now what is left is jsut my stupid stats and elective report. Sighs. Speaking of accounting. I am thoroughly irritated with the tutor. Or more like the subject. Why must they so particular about presentation etiquette? Lil things like reading abit frm cue cards also wanna say...discussing with group members to answer the Q and A session also wanna say..I mean c'mon lahs, we dunno how to answer wat, so of coz must dicuss rite!!! We are not as zai as others who can answer straight away wat!! WE NEED TO BLARDY THINK ABOUT YOUR QN SO THAT WE CAN GIVE U A BLARDY SATISFACTORY ANSWER!!! GRRRR. Really damn irritated when I saw that comment. I seriously do not see any problem with doing that. SIGHS. Watever lahs. I think my acct will get a C in the end. Damn blardy pissifying. And my tutor doesnt like me. She gave me a freaking C when I dun talk in class. so ok, i deserve it coz i dun do my tuts and therefore can't really answer much qn. Bu tmust she give my other frends a B or B+ when they dun bladry talk like me too!!!!!!! WAT THE FUCK. Argh. Sians. She better give me an A or shtg for class participation coz after that I made a serious effort to answer qn and present qn on the board ok!! Which reminds me of that boo boo I made during one of the presentation. I really did understand the tut but when she qn me about our presentation I kinda stunned. Hahah. And I even remembered asking my group mates on how to do that qn. Blardy hell. Now everyone thinks I am a sutpid kid. Argh. Ok, no more talking about accounting now. I really have sucha a bad experience this sem that I feel like switching to business. Terrible.

Anws. It was Bernard's bdae yesterday!!


Time really flies. Was out celebrating his bdae with charb, sinhui and wenhooi and I realize that they are almost coming to the end of their army life!! Charb is going to go out of course this november! So fast...It seems like yesterday when they first enlisted and looked like kukus becoz they had to shave their heads. And it was around this time that I was mulling about which course to take and which school to go to...Now, I am like going to complete my first year in uni and I dun even feel it!!! So wierd. I am hitting the BIG 2 2 months time and I dun even feel prepared to so called enter adulthood! SIGHS. So much responsibilities come with it. When u hit twenty plus, people expect u to be mroe mature and even if they dun, you are suppose to BE more mature. You are suppose to think a lil bit more, be a lil but more worried about ur career, bia a lil bit harder in ur studies since it is ur last leg before u enter the workforce so it is kinda a do or die situation...So much so much.

I AM feeling the stress come to me now. Not just the impending exams but somehow I feel that I seriously need to grow up. And ALOT. Sometimes I feel kinda childish at times and watching others close to me grow up and mature gradually really makes me rethink about my future. I am feeling less happy, less carefree, more worried, more easliy pissed off these days. More negativities and less positivities. More workload and less time for the better things in life. More school and less family and friends. More Cs and less As. More of superificial charlene and less of the real charlene...

I am slowly fading away. Losing myself.

Saturday, April 1, 2006 12:19 p.m.

I am getting EXCITED!!!!

I should be mugging for my fm quiz tmr and I still got like 1 more chap to go..

I should be preparing my marketing slides for tmr's presentation at freaking 10.30 am..

I should be damn stressed over the exams in 2 weeks but heck it!

Coz I am getting all pumped up for the trip after the exams!WHEET! Cant wait! hope sthg materalise..which I see no reason for it to not happen just that we haven really decided where to go and who the hell we are going with! HAHA. So me and weiming were like shouting across the hall trying to discuss something out of it and as ususal that stupid bugger did not really help but just kept saying that we should not go Thailand now because of al the unrest there now. Wah laos. Sian. Totally spoilsport! haha. But oh well I really wanna got thailand but I wun mind going anywhere lahs so as long it is somewhere out of this country! haha.And I really lurve my parents! Coz they said they will be willing to pay for 2 of the trips that I was planning to go. This and they sydney trip with my team! So nice of them! Of coz, being the filial daughter I am, I said that I would pay for the thailand trip lahs. I mean c'mon..the sydney trip is going to cost a few hundred more lehs haha...

The bottom line is...I am so so so so EXCITED!!!.

ok. Back to my FM.

Tuesday, March 28, 2006 11:45 p.m.

Photo matching!!
Decided to amuse myself during my short break (which resulted to a pretty long one once I was hooked onto it), so i went to this photo comparison thingy where they compare ur face with celebrities and see how much u resemble them. Wah liew. I am damn pissed off with the stupid program. WHY DO I FREAGGIN LOOK LIKK GUYS!!! 99% of the photos that I compared matched me to guys!! And ugly guys at that! OK, let me give u a list of people whom i am compared to

1) 50 cent (I am not even black)

2)Larry King (WTF?!! Do I LOOK that blardy old to u?!)

...MY GOODNESS!! Terrible!! I am going to boycott this program mans... :(

BUT...check out the pretty people that I look like!

1)Natalie Imbruglia

2) Anna Kournikova, beyonce knowles,Jada Pinkett SMith, Christina Aguilera, ANGELINA JOLIE?! WOAH! (Does that mean I am a sex bomb like them too?! *smirks*)

3)Song Hye-Kyo. You know the one who starred in qiu tian de tong hua? That damn famous korean drama where the girl died of leukemia, (wait a min..99% of the leads in korean films die of leukemia) but ok the one that starred in Full house with Rain?! *I LURVE RAIN!!* Wah liew, not bad heh! she is like one of the prettiest girls in korea lahs!HAHA. *double smrirks*

4) Choi Ji woo (another pretty woman!!)

Conclusion: I can look like a mysterious, sexy and pure and pretty!! HAHA, so i decided that besides the previous post, I can play this thing to make myself happier!! hah.

Anyways, went on to do a comparison for my brother and found out that the ugly people my brother was compared to was much worse than mine so does that mean i am not as ugly as him then? haha, just a thought. wahahah....go play! its damn fun...MyHeritage.com..

Saturday, March 25, 2006 06:52 p.m.

Post to make myself happy!
Just mugged finish 1 chapter of FM and i felt a bit bored so I decided to blog some stuff to make myself happy! Yes, I am waiting for Sari's reply on the status of the nus match. In the meantime, shall update u guys on my up and coming plans for the 3 mths hols!!

1) Shop Shop Shop!! (Well, not so much since I am going to Thailand but yes still a far bit of shopping)

2) Meet up with my dearies whom I have not seen for a long long looong time! Guys and girls included.

3) Pack my room!

4)Go shopping at Thailand!! Yay!! Can't wait!! Tho nothing is confirmed, I do hope that something comes out of it and we can still go! Must plan plan plan! I shall go and push shuxian they all tsk tsk.

4) Go Sydney play touch rugby with the team! HAHA. OK I sound damn spendthrift, I mean going to thailand first then sydney, but heh wat are holidays for man! And I am working to pay off my debts all u jealous peasies out there haha.

5) Shop for stuff to decorate my new single room!! Hahahahahah I hope I can get the room I want, but I think it should not be a problem coz I have 134.9 pts!!! YES....Much more than I had predicted. Which I am so gald of because at least I know my time spent on doing all those stuff did not go to waste. Of coz, I did enjoy the process at first but after a while I got so tired of it all coz I was laggin behind my work, which explains my mad mugging now but still at least something good came out of it!

6) To be continued....

Haha SIANS. Supid zsing just went to Hongkong with huishan!! And huishan jsut went to Italy! Talk about the benefits of studying in LSE. ARGH. I am so dripping with jealousy right now! The very thought of them on the cushy seats of the airplane and sipping their apple juice watching movie on board the plane make me wanna raise the whte flag on my books and go with them! hah. Kidding. Of coz I cant do that. Unless I wanna take the 4 subs again next sem which is totally senseless. I'd rather get it over and done with. But the thought is VERY inviting I must say. Anyways, hope they have a great time there! I mean he hasnt seen her for like ages and long distance relationship is very hard to mantain. But they are doing well and I am glad for them! So go on guys! I will be enjoying wat u are enjoying, but 1 mth later! haha B-A-H. oh and did I mention that I got a merit certificate from my social subcomm?? Apparently Christine felt that I had done quite a fair bit for the social subcomm and so I wasawarded the grand merit prize! Hahah geez thanks! But then, I felt abit undeserved coz there were other people who worked just as hard as me..But nonetheless am quite happy with that cert (haha!) so I shall frame it up and hang it in my new room! haha wat a show-off.

Ok! I feel immensely happier knowing that there are so many GREAT things waiting for me after my exams!! YAY!!!! 1 mth more only! May I pass all my subs man! I dun wanna tabao.. haha alrites. back to WORK!

Saturday, March 25, 2006 03:29 p.m.

I feel terribly cheated of my feelings. I really do. I hate being dropped like that when there is not reason for it. Is it coz I haven been going regularly? I had projects to do and can't just leave like I wanted to. Is it coz I did not say anything? I am sorry but I really did forget about it. It may seem like a rather lame excuse but yes I am fucking forgetful and I truly was too caught up in it that I forgot abt it. I am sorry. I dare not say that I am 100% committed but you can bet that I am definitely NOT slipshod about it. oK, maybe i might have deserved it to other people who does not really know how I feel but I really do treat it with importance. I just feel sad now ok. It feels fucking terrible and I do not like it. Watever. Watever. And as usual, I am just gonna smile about it and laugh it off like wat I always do and hope that that feeling would just go away and pretend that everything is fine. Afterall, I always try to project such an image isnt it? And I mean others are happy and so am I, giving the impression that I fuck care about it. Yeah. THats it. I AM HAPPY.

I can't bring myself to write anymore detailed than this.

This is one of the times when I feel completely at a lost.

Tuesday, March 21, 2006 01:38 p.m.

Thers a thief in my house!
My maid is a fucking thief I tell you. And we did not just assumed it, we have cold hard evidence. Recently, my brother realized that he has been losing money one too many times and so he decided to test my maid to see if she was the thief. Well, previously, we have already suspected that she stole stuff from us but we can't confirm. However, my poor brother got so fed up with losing petty cash so often that he realized it could make up to quite a substantial amount and therefore could seriously cripple his finances in the long run that he decided to run his own test on her. So like there was this day he put 3 two dollar note under his desk and went out. When he came bakc home, he realized that one of the bill was missing. That was the first incident. The second time when my brother tried that again, he lost the same amount. Today she had super quick hands I tell you. My brother just left to bathe and when he came back, he found out that one of his 2 dollar bill was missing again!!! LIKE WAT THE FUCK?!! So bold of her to steal in broad daylight and when my brother is around sommore!!! She is damn terrible. Which reminds me of something. Some time ago, I lost my handphone and despite searching everywhere for it in my room, I can't seem to find it. I was damn sure that I had brought it into the room with me and it was one of those rare occasions that I actually wasn't so blur, so I definitely did not leave it somewhere else. Guess where I found it after 2 days? In a plastic bag underneath my table. Like huh?!! Why would it end up there? I did not even knwo the existence of that plastic bag until I happen to look into it innocently and saw my dear handphone lying there!! Wah lau eh. She is damn damn damn terrible I tell you. I bet she must have put it back because my mum got suspicious of her and qustioned her about it. TAMADE. Wat an asshole. Before she started staeling stuff from us, I thought she was quite a nice person and all and now I realize that maids can actually be damn conniving sometimes. Maybe she was driven by circumstances or wat to steal but still!! We treat her so nice lehs! Despite the fact that my mom nags at her almost every other day but the rest of us treat her damn nice can!! Esp my dad, he will even scold my mum sometimes for screaming at my maid lahs!! WTF. And this is how she repays us.Terrible!!! Totally unacceptable!! As expected, my dad is damn pissed off with her now. We had our fair share of dishonesty in one of our maids in the past and so I guessed he can't really tolerate this kinda nonsense after that. Maybe I should just write about that story since I found it damn unbelievable myself..

OK, so my second maid, Emma, worked for us like 6 years and she is damn efficient and smart and all so she could manage the household quite well. My parents trusted her alot and treated her damn well too, like sponsoring her air ticket back to Phillippines to visit her parents and give her money when she needed it (or so she claims) for her father's funeral fee first then her mum's etc..A few months after she went back, one of my mum's friend's maid actually told my mum's friend that she saw my maid and that BOTH her parents were well and that my maid actually told her that she was lying to us when she said she needed money for this and that!!! WAH LAU!!!! BITCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I mean like who the hell will curse their parents to die so that they can bluff some money out of other people!! Terrible!!! So so terrible!! All the lies and deceit. And most importantly the trust that we had in her was totally misplaced and after that we felt totally cheated, both of our money and feelings. As if the relationship that we had with her in that past was all but a facade, and beneath all that nice exterior is actually a despicable and treacherous thief scheming to suck more money out of us. Terrible terrible!

Back to my present maid now. Even though my impression of her totally changed, but I do not wish for anything more than just to send her back. That is a good enough solution to that problem now.

Monday, March 20, 2006 10:43 p.m.

Love bites
haha do not be mistaken, I don't mean love bites like the little red dots you find on someone's neck but its the time whereby I start thinking about how unloved I am. BAH. Its all bimbo's fault! Who ask her to tell me how romantic her night was on saturday that she made me realize once again that love is sucha wonderful thing to have. That aside, I am very very VERY VERY VERY happy for her!!! Coz she finally found the him after like so many ups and downs and miscalls....So yeah, just enjoy the moment now because isn't that wat love at this age is all about? Pure innocent utter bliss. Dun need to think so much one lahs haha..Only time can tell..but yes, that guy of hers set the benchmark so high that I think it is kinda hard to beat that kinda standard. SO ALL THE GUYS OUT THERE WHO WANNA CHASE AFTER ME BE WARNED!! U BETTER LISTEN TO ALL TH NITTY GRITTY STUFF THAT I MENTIONED TO YOU AND REMEMBER IT SO THAT YOU CAN DO IT WHEN U WANNA ASK ME TO BE YOUR GIRLFRIEND!! I will be super touched I tell you. Who won't be if he did what that guys of hers did just to pop the question. MY GOD. Its damn unbelievable! :) So as I was telling my dear bimbo, my future boyfriend-to-be better bring me on a helicopter ride or sthg to that extent in order to make me say yes. HAH. Right. Kidding! I am very easy one lah huhs. OK must not say liddat. If not like very easy to get hor. OK watever. Why am I stressing voer this anws?! Not as if like got any potential candidates now haha. Sighs. Living in my own world again. HAHAH! :)

Anyways, thanks bimbo! Your sat nite story made me happier today coz it made me realize that sucha a sweet lil story can actually exist. And congrats to you too! (erps, sounds a bit wrong but if u are reading this, u get my drift lah huh. Bimbos cannot express their thoughts properly sometimes hor. *pss..remember the "I oust u" joke?*heh.

Monday, March 20, 2006 10:16 p.m.

One of those days
Its one of those days where I am super tired but just felt so borrred that I wanna get out and do something! I mean its damn easy to call people to go out (its just a phone call away anyway), but when I think of what I am to do when I get out and the fact that I have to get changed and take the mrt or bus to some other place, I just decided otherwise. So that explains why I am sitting on the cushy sofa and blogging away. Right. I could have studied instead but I am too tired to do so lah huh. WAH LAU. Can someone please tell me what to do! ARGH.

Anyways, to all my suitors, admirers, friends and family, I have MOVED! Ok, to another block in the same hall lah huh but still, I have finally moved from the ulu pandan district to the CBD!! Hahah. Yeah, I was like staying in a damn ulu part of my hall whereby after like 8 o'clock, activities come to a standstill. I mean not that I mind, ok I minded at first coz I was like thinking wat the hell, I stay in hall hoping to get some fun outta it and yet I am stuck in ulu pandan..But I realize that as days go by, I learnt to appreciate the tranquility and peace that I've always enjoyed staying there but didn't realize until I had to move. On the big day, as I shifted my stuff over, I saw the cleaning auntie and I realize that that would be the last time I can greet her "zao an" (good morning) or "chi bao le me you" (have u eaten) etc etc. Or to see her washing the toilets early in the morning or resting in the pantry..And I will miss living in world war 3 (if u have read a few entries back, I was complaining about those gun shot sounds coming from the forest in the dead of the night)I will miss the times when my door shake when that happens..I will miss borrowing tutorials from qiuling (Coz its so convenient to just walk over to take from her, but I think she is damn glad!! muahah)..I will miss trudging up that familiar 4 flights of stairs when I get back to hall after trainings..I will miss seeing edgar or chee wee or rui fang across the block and shouting "eh!!!" across to them, scaring the shit of edgar sometimes..haha..Most of all, I will miss living in a single deluxe room in ulu pandan because there is just soooo much privacy.. And I will not be able to lie on my bed and watch movies at the same time because I have 2 beds to myself! And I will not be able to anyhow dump my clothes on the other bed or on the other table because I only have 1 table and bed now!!BLEH.

OK, after lamenting so much having to give up ALLLL those things now, I must admit that it is quite exciting moving to CBD now la..And it would be quite an experience to room with Candice I think! I got a shock when I went into her room (my room now too) because she is soo neat can! Her table is like damn organized and when I think about mine, I suddenly got quite ashamed of myself haha..ok dun get me wrong, I did not say that it would be bad to room with her hor..In fact I think she can bring out the neater side of me, something which has been lsot for quite a while huh, and I will be more motivated to mug(I hope) since she studies so hard! And I finally have someone to converse with me at night, instead of talking to myself sometimes, at least some presence there so I won't feel so lonely and pathetic at times (esp at night)..So yes! WELCOME ME TO MY NEW ROOM AT xx-xx-xxxx!!!

Saturday, March 4, 2006 07:10 p.m.

Fuck Comfort Cabbbs!!!
wah lau!!!! I just realised that I got cheated by fucking comfort taxi driver!!!! %^@^^^#$#!$@&!!!!!! He gave me ten bucks less!! Why? Trying to cheat me when u know I just woke up from my lil nap in ur car issit? Or U think I got a fucking I-am-easily-cheated look?! Or do I look that fucking blur to you?! OK, i might be blur but what gives you the right to cheat me like that!!! ARGH!!! I hope u kana a passenger tonight that bring u frm pasir ris to boon lay and then run away when he/she reach their destination! No make that 2 or 3 or 4 in one night!! I hope u get minus revenue tonight and many other nights!!! God, I am damn pissed off.

Friday, March 3, 2006 11:21 p.m.

Fuck comfort cabs!!!!!

Friday, March 3, 2006 11:21 p.m.

You were meant for me

"You Were Meant For Me"

I hear the clock, it's six a.m.
I feel so far from where I've been
I got my eggs and my pancakes too
I got my maple syrup, everything but you.
I break the yolks, make a smiley face
I kinda like it in my brand new place
I wipe the spots off the mirror
Don't leave the keys in the door
Never put wet towels on the floor anymore' cause
Dreams last for so long
even after you're gone
I know you love me
And soon you will see
You were meant for me
And I was meant for you.
I called my momma, she was out for a walk
Consoled a cup of coffee but it didn't wanna talk
So I picked up a paper, it was more bad news
More hearts being broken or people being used
Put on my coat in the pouring rain
I saw a movie it just wasn't the same
'Cause it was happy and I was sad
It made me miss you oh so bad 'cause
Dreams last for so long
Even after you're gone
I know you love me
And soon you will see
You were meant for me
And I was meant for you.
I go about my business, I'm doin fine
Besides what would I say if I had you on the line
Same old story, not much to say
Hearts are broken, everyday.
I brush my teeth and put the cap back on
I know you hate it when I leave the light on
I pick a book up. Turn the sheets down.
Take a deep breath and a good look around
Put on my pjs and hop into bed
I'm half alive but I feel mostly dead
I try and tell myself it'll be all right
I just shouldn't think anymore tonight 'cause
Dreams last for so long
Even after you're gone
I know you love me
And soon I know you will see
You were meant for me
And I was meant for you
Yeah.... You were meant for me and I was meant for you

Friday, March 3, 2006 09:16 p.m.

Just a certain boy that I used to like
Haiys. Being auntie agony these days just reminds me of my own plight. I begin to think a little it more than usual about this certain boy that I used to like in the past. Do I still think about him? Yes, definitely. What will I do and feel if i ever see him again? Will it be butterfiles in my stomach? Or just a sigh of regret? I used to picture this scenario in my head. What if one day, while walking back to my office I see him? Will I go like
"Oh heh hi! How have U been! Long time no see huh! haha."
Or will I just walk away and pretend I did not see him?

Sighs. I would think about silly stuff like this every now and then. WTF. I hate it that I take damn long to get over someone. Something which just dawned on me ever so clearly after talking to a certain someone about HER certain someone. Just a crush somemore. It was like that in that past and now it has come back to haunt me once again. So much time has passed but yet so little of the feeling I felt then was lost. Sometimes, in the midst of a lecture, I would subconciously scribble his name on my notes. Draw flowers lah, birds, etc etc Doesn't this say alot then? Even though I have new crushes now and then but somewhere at the back of my mind, his presence still lingers. Sighs. I should probably wake up my idea soon. Its not gonna happen and will never happen.

Sunday, February 26, 2006 03:01 p.m.

I am back to my kiddy self again! Watching Sinbad-Legend of the seven seas now on HBO haha..cartoons..AHH..I used to love watching Scooby Doo on cartoon network and mind you, I was like in secondary school and JC and that time. Sighs. Those were the happier times man, where I dun have to rush for projects, assignments etc etc..Oh Have I mentioned that I wanna sock my elective teacher in the face so much? Yeap, the urge just gets stronger and stronger the more I read my articles. I don't see the point in doin all those shit. Not as if I am learning a lot from those articles?!!! I thought it would be damn fun that we get to study how films and what not influence the society..but noooooooo the stupid teacher jsut made us do articles after articles. ARGH...FUCK OFF MAN!!!! Think he wanted to show us films on the week before the recess break but I wun know coz I got so sick of lessons that I just skipped it altogether. SIGHS. Lost count of how many thousand lessons i skipped already. This sem is so so bad for me. The pressure is on again. I feel like an accountant already, always stressing at the end of the study period. haha get it? Accountants stress when the ACCOUNTING PERIOD is gonna be over and I stress when my STUDY PERIOD is over haha.See the link now? ok albit lame i guess. But U get the pic lah huh. I am definitely no less stresser than those accountants man. Talk about assimilating into environment now. Blabber blabber blabber, more blabber. Oh well, regardless of the fact that I kept complaining how much my hall stuff and trainings and what not takes up so much of my time that I could hardly study, deep down inside I knew that it is jsut all my own doing in the end. I mean if stella can keep up with her work amidst all the endless FOC things to do..why cant I? The bottom line is, I am not willing to max out my time to do my work but whenever I have that lil bit of time, I'd rather spend it resting or sleeping. Sighs. THEN I will give myself this excuse whenever I am doing that that I need my precious sleep and rest and yada yada yada yada, thereby justifying my lazy actions. Slap me please. I am getting sick and tired of finding excuses for my laziness but yet I can't seem to get out of it! Argh what happen to the once disciplined me?! SIGHS. Its back to my readings, something which I had PLANNED to finisd yesterday morning. So I am like 1 day behind time, haha.

Saturday, February 25, 2006 10:04 a.m.

NTU Touch Attack Carnival 2006!
HEH EVERYBODY! Gear yourself up for the touch carnival of the year!! NTU is holding a touch carnival on 12 March 2006 and you are all invited to join! We have a under 20 girls category, women open and a mixed category! Spaces are limited as there can only be 8 teams per category so sign up now now now!! There will be a goodie bag with free singlets as well! Its 6 per team and its a 4 v 4 match..$70 per team if u provide a referee and $80 if u don't. All the forms and information can be found on this website -- http://www.touchattack.blogspot.com, so what are u guys waiting for?! Join in the excitement and meet some hot guys and girls at NTU!HAHA.

Friday, February 24, 2006 04:07 p.m.

Attack of Mr Fun-gal
Argh. Fungal attack!!Yucks. Now every morning when I wake up, my eyes will be clouded with mucus. Double yucks. Then, I would have to clean it off before I can see anything. Triple yucks. Yuck yuck yuck. So now I am stuck wearing specs all day long and it is not that I hate it or anything, but more like its super inconvenient especially since I have to wear it to training and dance practice recently which is pissing me off since my specs is not very tights and it keeps dropin down. WHEW. Say the above sentence all in one breath man haha. Ok SO, now I am stuck at home because it is not exactly a very nice sight to be seen with mucus oozing out from my eye every now and then..(ok abit exaggerated but u get the pic)ARGH. stupid me. Why didn't I clean my contact lens properly before I wear or keep them!! Retribution I tell u. My contact lens are protesting against me coz I didn't take care of them when I had them. Bah. Hope that I can recover by tommorrow (which i seriously doubt so) so that I do not have to wear them for competition! Not a look that I would wanna don on the field man. And there is the chance that my specs will be whacked out and stepped upon, crushed and utterly destroyed by the mighty boots of the opposing team. Yeah right, they are like so much smaller than me so why would that happen la huh. Argh, watever lah! I am just damn pisssed that this thing is causing me so much inconvenience. And sorry bimbo! I cant go out with you yesterday coz of that too...bleh. Hope u are feeling better this morning!! :)

Anws, this holiday is doing me no good haha. Instead of catching up with my work, I am catching up with my sleep and TV more than anything else. Textbooks are untouched, tutorials are undone, etc etc. SIGHS. Why am I so lazy?!!ARGH. Blame it on bad genes man. hahah. Oh wells. Hopefully I will get my shit together by this weekend and do some serious work so that I wun be lagging so much when school starts. But its ok lah huh.. no matter what, I am still slightly better than my brother from the same family tree..*drumroll*..Mr Quek Weiming! hahaahha aka Louis Koo(self-proclaimed) aka M5 *rolls eyes*..haha He is such a slacker that its quite amazing how he actually manage to pass his last sem man haha. So I feel quite relieved that at least there is one such slacker out there like me (amongst all the thousands of hardworking students out there) who hasnt really done much too! Do not be mistaken, I am not proud of the fact that I am one such slacker, instead, I am quite ashamed of myself lah. I mean what happened to the chao mugger that I used to be? One who finishes all her TYS and even do them 3 times over?! What about doing my homework like the week before we are suppose to hand up? Or reading her textbooks when she has the free time?! Yes, that was once me. But I can only say that the passion for mugging extinguished almost immidiately after I went to JC. I never really gotten back to how I used to study even though miraculously I manage to get good enough grades to get into NTU, but that was after 1 plus months of hardcore mugging man and it wasnt' exactly a very memorable experience. All that stress and pressure and work to be done..But ok lah, I never really regretted going into Hwa chong, infact I am damn glad that I went there because it was there that I met all those wonderful people and made some pretty close frends too! (Don't have to name it, U know who who u guys are!!) Not to mention that it was there that I was introduced to touch rugby and dance, which still makes up a big part of my life up till now..So yes, even though my studies died on me but I still cherish all those OTHER things that I have gotten out of there!Alrites, enough of reminiscing, it is time to get back to my pile of readings to do. But funnily, I always feel so much happier knowing that I have lived a life that I have lived during those 2 years.

Thanks guys..U just made my day.. :)

Just some further ramblings: God, I feel like socking my elective teacher, he thinks that we got nothing better to do than to keep reading pages after pages of societal interpretation huh huh huh!! And do we look like our ang moh damn power one?!! Keep giving us such long and chim stuff to read that after the 1st line I feel like stuffing the paper down his throat. Argh. pardon me for all that, I am ususally not so violent. Ask anyone who knows me. (Tsk tsk!) Thank god I did not choose sociology as my course.

Friday, February 24, 2006 10:45 a.m.

SIGHS. After reading waikit's vday post i realize that i also want someone to do such sweet things for me!! Don't have to be guy lah huh.. even if my frends do such stuff for me I will be damn damn satisfied too! Bah. But then again, I realize that there is not much point or excuse for our friends to do such stuff for us! Like for wat?!!haha even i will not do such things unless its their bdae or wat..but stillll...c'mon lahs..who the hell do such stuff for their friends one..So romantic for wat. Argh. I am jsut blabbering nonsense here lah. Too deprived of love.hahaaaaa.oh wells. Thats why i concluded something. My future boyfriend MUST be damn artistically inclined so that he can do such arty farty romantic stuff for meeee!!! :)

OK, so on a more serious note, everybody!! come and support me on 1 march 2006!!! I am singing for hall idol!! I want BEEG BEEG banners and posters and lightsticks that forms my name and catcalls etc etc, SO COME AND SUPPORT ME!!! Venue is NTU hall of residence 12..hahah siao liao. I am such a braggart man, cant stand myself. BUT WATEVER LAH HUH! JUST COME AND SUPPORT MEEE!!! I think I might just get a nervos breakdown on that day and peng even be4 I get on stage to sing my song...Bah. Or I might not even make it to that day coz its damn freaking hard to find cds that do not have the singer's voice lah huh..:( Damn irritated now....Think I will just have to make do with watever ktv vcds taht I have if I really cannot find the song that I want. AARGH. Oh wells enough bitching of that now. Evn I am getting sick of it! wahah.

Half the recess break is over and I haven started doing my hmwork yet!! Or rather, CATCHING up with my work. Argh. To think I was so pumped up abt finally doing my work this hol and when I Finally have some time I just find myself doing projects, training, rehersing for dance, finding ktv vcds (...), and catching up with my rest. Oh my oh my. Looks like 1 week is not enuff!!! Somebody help!

Wednesday, February 22, 2006 11:24 p.m.

Oh no!!!!!!
Oh SHIAAAT!!! I spilt water all over my computer!!daarn..and most of it landed on the touch pad sommore!!! (my touchpad is responding slower now I swear.) help!! I just kept using the hairdyer to blow-dry my computer..how silly but that is the only thing that I can think of to do to get the water out!! hopefully the water evaporates or something....Talk about the things people do when they panic.

And can they stop all the live firing exercises already!!! Its like 10 in the morning!!(not as if there is any relation) but yes, someone here is trying to do her homework!! *ROAR* As if the defeaning sound is not enough, my door had to shake under all that sound!!Please stop making me feel like I am living in world war 2 my dearest loyal soldiers!!!!!! WTF.

Monday, February 6, 2006 09:48 a.m.

Busy busy busy
Ok, so after that somewhat vulgar and useless entry that I wrote because the lizards were pissing me off so much, its time for some proper blogging. Anyways I realize that when someone is pissed off at something, they tend to lump all other things together and scold them all at one shot. Sounds like the many many times when I kept getting scolded by my mum for the most incredulous things.

Ok,so here's an update of the more enjoyable things that I've been doing these few weeks..First was the hall chinese new year dinner..And I don't mean the process, I meant the actual event itself. The process of planning for it wasnt so memorable I guess because I was so busy that time and the organization of the dinner didn't exactly went too smoothly and I blew my top one too many times that even I got sick of myself after a while.Its just damn hard to get everybody down to meetings coz people will be absent at different times and so in the end everything gets so disorganized..Oh wells. Thank god that I am only in the committee for one more event. BUT like I said, the Chinese new year dinner was quite a success all thanks to leonard who manage to get like 60 ppl to come down for it at 11 p.m the night before the event?!! Wahaha, talk about senior power man. And guess what! I was the cai shen babe for that night can?!! The title sounds damn sexy right? But there is nothing sexy about distributing oranges to 80 ppl!! (yes, taht is the job of the cai shen babe).Argh.haha. After dinner, there was supposed to be some free bowling thing but I went ghost watching with jansen, shuxian, zhiqing, jeannette and weiming!! Never underestimate the guts of small girls I tell u..Zhiqing and jeannette are mad, they wanted to walk thru this pathway that supposedly leads to the sea or sthg (oh we were at marina steamboat for the cny dinner btw) and the pathway didn't even have any streetlights!! The rest of us just stood on the road and refuse to move any step further into the path coz it was really too scary to venture into!! I couldn't even see the end of the path even though it shouldn't be too long?!! My goodness..what were they thinking man! And to think jeanette din even dare to go to my hall's fright night (when it wasn't even remotely scary) but dare to do such crazy shit in the middle of the night!! hmmm..

Haha yeah so taht was so muchf or cny dinner and after that was the break for chinese new year!! I was so excited just to be back at home and not do anything! U can't imagine how happy I was when I stepped through the door and saw all the boxes of new year goodies!! I just grabbed as much as I could and parked myself in front of the tv munching away...wahaha...Start of my diet nightmare man. But yeah, this year was not as fun as previous years I guess coz I just spent my holiday catching up on some much needed sleep on my own sweet bed..And I ha to do project on chu san!!! HOW SADDENING IS THAT!!!!!!! Someone shoot my marketing tutor for me can. Sighs. So yes, all in all I felt that my holiday was damn short and I din even enjoyed myself!! Bleh. Now that I am back at school, its more homework and project and lectures. Sighs.

Oh! but I do have 2 last happy things to report for the month!! That is the 2 steamboat dinner for my uni class and hc class!!! but I shall blog about that later...Now its back to page 2 of my articles!!! BAH.

Sunday, February 5, 2006 11:39 p.m.

I f*cking
I f*cking hate the fact that the lizards make so much noise when mating etc ESPECIALLY at night. I wish they all curl up and d*e.

I f*cking hate the fact that I have to come back to hall on a sun night for a 1 hr meeting. I wish I can curl up and d*e.

I f*cking hate the fact that I have to read long pages of boring articles for my elective. I wish the tutor curl up and d*e.

I f*cking hate the fact that I have to do project on chinese new year and lovely sundays like this. I wish the exam system curl up and d*e.

I f*cking hate the fact that I am studying in NTU which makes EVERYWHERE so inaccessible. I wish NTU curl up and d*e.

I f*cking hate the fact that I am so tired all the time. I wish the brain cells that keeps telling me to go to sleep curl up and d*e.

The reason for the asterik sign is because it is still chinese new year and I do not wish to say inauspicious things on this joyous occasion. haha. Actually I don't really mean all those things I say except for the lizard part and the reading long articles for my elective part coz I am freaking tired now and I still have to read 13 pages worth of dry, boring, articles about society. To top it all of, those irritating lizards had to make soo much noise in the middle of the night!!! Argh. Can someone just set a fire to my hall and burn all the lizards but not buring down my hall?!! hmmm...

I hate lizards.

Sunday, February 5, 2006 10:49 p.m.

little snippets here and there
If I could record down all the stupid things that I have done this sem, I am sure I can make it into a 3 hr special or sthg..Like seriously!!! I can't even keep count of how many times I have embarassed myself. Take today for example..I ran off after smacking Wanhui's butt during the interhall cheerleading competition today and when she turned around and saw this guy standing behind her she thought it was him who did it and asked him abt it!! How exactly the conversation went I dared not ask but all I saw was that the guy was profusely trying to explain that he did not do it and he looked so wronged!! HAHAHA. I thought it was dman funny the way the guy looked and all but after I saw Wanhui's reaction I was so scared. She looked pissed!! Aiyos....Sorry mans!! I really din meant for it to turn out this way lah huh...But must admit it turned out to be quite funny and thg guy looked damn incredulous too like he couldn't believe that such a thing would happen to him at all!! he worst thing was the people standing behind us saw what happened and they were like giggling away!! OMG. Really had to add fuel to fire..oh wells. Apologized to her after that and I guessed she was ok with it lahs..oh well. But I still think it was quite funny the way things turned out. ANWS.interhall cheerleading was quite fun to watch!! I mean I never really watched a real cheerleading competition live before so it was quite an experience. Thought that the crowd could be more spontaneous and happening tho..like a bit not so rowdy considering that all 15 halls were congregated in a indoor badminton hall. Still, it was quite amzing as to how the girls can do certain stunts and I really think that guys are much much much MUCH stronger than what they looked!! Cheers to the hall 12 cheerleaders!! I thought u guys did a FANTASTIC job!!!!!!!!:)

This week is really like a rollercoaster ride for me, both emotionally and physically. Ok maybe not much physically considering I pulled my muscle and so din go for training this week but mentally I am exhausted. Felt so damn fucking sick at Financial seminar today and after a while the tutor din make any sense to me. Serious. He is the worst teacher I ever had. Never felt so lost in a tutorial before. Thought that I was gonna be down with fever or something. Thank god nothing happened, but my cough-flu-sorethroat combination is still around lah huh.Watever lahs. It been such a busy week that I cant really rest properly anws.I never had to do so many things in a week in my entire life be4!! First beachout then CNY then still got ABC tmr.. coupled with other things here and there, I hardly have time to do my tutorials at all!! Thought I could do them during the week but I have been sleeping at ridiculous hours until I simply dun have the energy to do them anymore..And its not as if I have a lot of other commitments likf FOC or cheerleading at one go but I seem to have a lot of things to do..HMM..I wonder why.

Wanted to blog some more serious stuff to do with friends, shc and all but my thoughts are so messed up right now that I need time to tidy them first if not if I just type without thinking, I would probabaly say the wrong things and offend some people which I seriously dun wanna do so. I admit that I dun have the guts yet to lash out at people in my blog and say what I really feel about certain things so those have to wait until I am ready to do so. But even in real life sometimes, I feel that I am just covering up those emotions and trying to make everyone feel better about everything and try not to make them pissed. Sometimes I feel like saying, Fuck off.

I am such a wimp sometimes.

Thursday, January 19, 2006 12:06 a.m.

I feel damn busy these days..to be exact since the start of this week!!! ARGH. Everything starts to pileup all of a sudden...actually it is more of my fault lah since I din really bother trying to clear my tutorials first so now not only do I have to do stuff for beachout, CNY9ok not a lot i guess) and god knows wat, I have to attend quite a lot of meetings and juggle trainings in between...........ARGH. SHOOT ME. I am so tied up that tutorials are the last thing on my mind. hopefully everything clears up by the end of this week so I can start doing ym tutorials proper and understanding them instead of doing them for the sake of not being disclosed by the teacher muahaha. And I just (JUST)realized that I need to memorize lyrics for my auditions this wed for NBS week singing competition..Argh. Argh.

And I still miss my daddy and home.

Tuesday, January 17, 2006 02:23 a.m.

*Coughs* *Coughs Coughs* Argh. My throat hurts like shit. And I am feeling hot cold hot cold now. Think I am gonna come down with something and the worst thing is I am in hall today!!!!Just drank pipagao frm the bottle coz I was too lazy to go and wash my spoon in the toilet then wash it again after I used it haha. Wat a lazy piece of shit I am. Argh. I have this sudden urge to catch a cab back (but the chances are quite slim since my hall is located in the uluest part of ulu pandan(aka Ntu) and so hailing a cab would be mission impossible and calling is not an option too coz the cab driver prob wun know where the hell is my hall and I dunno whats my hall address!!) SO. yes as I was saying I wanna go home and I want my daddy!! I wun be seeing him for like another 1 week plus coz he is flying overseas. It is times like this when u need ur daddy to come and cheer u up and be there for you. Yes I am a daddy's girl, so what. Hmph. I realise that my daddy has been my pillar of strength all these years and I am really really really grateful that I have him as my dad. Perhaps god will be so kind as to let him be my dad again in my next life? Hmmm.

Monday, January 16, 2006 12:53 a.m.

It was a trying day
Just came back frm hall supper and I am so so so tired i tell u. It all began last night when i realize I actually need to register for my electives!!! ARGH. And I only found out becuase I happen to see Yuzhe's nick and realize that we actually need to acknowledge ur electives! Like WTF?!! I thought when I applied for it and it appeared on my adventure (its someplace online that all NTU students goes to chk their tutorials and lectures and stuff) that means it is confirmed!! ARGH. Then I typed in the wrong password so they barred me frm the school's system. In then end, I had to make a trip down to the IT centre in school to reset my password and re-register for my elective!! ARGH. Can somebody just shoot me or rather shoot whoever made such a complicated rule?!! HAHA. ok. actually it aint that complicated considering only me and Yuzhe din know BUT I was just damn pissed off that they caused me so much inconvenience. In the end, I dun even need to lug my laptop all the way to Shanghai and pay to use the internet just to register for my elective!!!!! Argh. Such a waste of time. Today is just not my day man. Then this morning I took the wrong bus to the IT centre and ended up in South Spine instead!! And if thats not bad enough, I thought I could take some shortcut but instead that took me and extra 15 mins to get to the stupid IT centre which I realize that IF i had walked I would just take like wat 5 mins?!! ARGH. Then I had so much trouble trying to print my notes and then came 3hrs of financial management seminar!! MY GOODNESS. 3 WHOLE FREAKING HOURS CAN!!! It took me all of my mental strength to keep awake and to actually figure out wat the hell the tutor was rambling on about..Goodness gracious. It was one long seminar..Had supper hoc at night and just came back. Shant elaborate too much on it coz I am too tired to do so haha just that it was qt a funny night considering that 70 of us, yes seventy, of us were walking along the red light district taking in all the sights and sounds (if u get my drift) Ok, there were no sounds. I just added that to spice up the story haha. alrites. its time for bed. sorry for the very erms not so fluent entry but I just felt like typing sthg. nite guys!

Thursday, January 12, 2006 01:20 a.m.

Appreciating the better things in life
Damnit. Sorry I had to start this entry with such vulgarity but I just stupidely deleted my well written (haha) FINISHED entry..ANWS. I jus realized that I haven blogged in a week and its not as if I am too busy to even switch on my com or something but its just that I am plain lazy to collect my thought and write something. But since I slept most of my sunday away and it is raining and all (haha erms..like got no connection hor), I decided to blog something to satisfy my readers out there (Wat readers?!! :))

It finally dawned on me, after 19 years of my life, that I am such a lazy ass unwilling, not unable, to do anything else besides lying in bed and watching vcds most of my time..hahawatever lahs. Ever since I went into university I have adopted such a heck care attitude that even I find myself boring sometimes. People can tell me how fun it is to stay in hall, to take part in all the activities, go for late night supper, bunk in other people's room etc etc but how come I dun really seem to be doing all those things?!! I did, initially but after a while, I took to staying in my room and slacking instead coz I was too lazy. Oh well.

Ok, I just realised I am straying away from the main topic haha. As some of u will know, I went to Shanghai this hols and whenever people asked me about it when I cam back, here is how the conversation would go.

Friend: "So how was Shangai?"

Me:" Oh, it was ok lahs, but a bit boring after a while. Only shopping lors. But machiam like shopping in Singapore also so I recommend that people go there for 3-4 days only and not 8 days like me haha"

Friend:"Oh......" And then the conversation stops there. Seems like I killed the conversation hor? I mean c'mon, by replying that, who the hell wants to converse anything about Shanghai with me anymore?! I make it sound so uninteresting and all haha. After a few more bouts of such conversation, I began to feel a bit guilty lahs. I mean I was being sucha prick can, some people dun have the chance to go travelling lehs!! And yet I am still complaining. Someone slap me awake can. No, just kidding, I realised my mistake already haha. Anyways, I suddenly remembered this certain conversation I had with Kelvin a damn long time ago. I forgot how it came to watever that we were talking about but he asked me,"So, if given a choice,would you rather ur dad let u spend watever you want now and not have any savings for you or would you rather he save his money now for you to use later like maybe help you pay for your house?" hmm..oh I remembered why already. Coz he said I was spending too much money without thinking haha. Heh, I am better now, I think. And my reply was that I would rather he let me spend now and dun save money for me to use when I go out and work. OKOK...I know what you guys must be thinking...Of coz I would say that so I have more money to spend now mahs!! DUH. Haha, maybe subconciously I did lahs but I swear that when I said that to him, what I meant was that I did not wanna rely on him when I am working wat! I mean c'mon, I am working already lehs, I dun really expect my dad to pay for my stuff somemore can I??? Reflecting back now, I really burned quite a big hole in his pocket all these years...all my overseas trip and the stuff I spent on..I should really start learning how to spend more wisely. I am beginning to better appreaciate what I am given all 19 years of my life. Not that I did not in the past but I am BETTER appreciating those things. I feel really blessed to have my dad as my dad and my mum as my mum and even though I dun really like some of the things she does I know she still loves me lahs. My dad will tell me how she queue for damn long to see the principal when they refuse to take me into the Primary shcool and finally the principal had to relent coz my mother was so persistent haha. Or the times when she would just go and pray for me many days before and after my exams. And my dad..haha for being my chaffeur for the past 19 years..ask any of my friends and they will know haha..For being my counsellor whenever I get nervous breakdown during exams. For just letting me feel safe..that no matter wat happens I always have him to fall back on. So sometimes I will joke that I dun even mind staying with him until old at our condo haha.

Oh..went to this nice cafe to have dinner with wenting on Friday, actually we wanted to have lunch one, but you know lahs.. my school is so blardy far away..located at the most ulu pandan end of Singapore that we took 2 hours to reach there can!! Wah laus.. we ended up eating dinner in the end..shit I wanted to recommend this cafe to you guys but I forgot the name!!! Its located opposite Paradiz centre..its shophouse style..erms...quite elongated and the shop's basic colour is yellow..haha so if you are interested can go and find it! Its 24 hrs somemore!!! :)

Anyways, I am going off to watch my all time fav senseless and stupidly funny show but I like to watch coz some how or rather I always feel very happy watching it..haha..cya!

Sunday, January 8, 2006 07:24 p.m.


AWWWWW.....Can someone buy me that?!!! SO PRETTY!!!!! I will get that car when I save up enough!! ERM. When will that be?!! haha or I welcome anyone who wants to buy that for me!!! I will make a very good girlfriend....RIGHT....As if i will sell myself for a pink volswagen beetle!!! hahahaha. NVm. I shall keep that in mind and get it later!!:)

Friday, January 6, 2006 01:25 p.m.

Shang-Shang-Shanghai part 2
Heh heh! Its part 2 of the shanghai tour! Dun be misled by that happy tune of my intro. I am quite pissed off now actually. I am stuck in the apartment surfing the net so early in the morning instead of sleeping in or at least roaming around shanghai!! And it is all coz I am having stomach cramps from diarrhoea!! Argh. Din sleep much last night coz I was cramping so much and as if it was not enough, I kept having nightmares about the registration for my electives! Like wtf. I mean it is just simply registering for my electives right but noo....my timetable suck so much that I can't fit the electives that I want into it and I think now I have to take either "Telling with Society" or "Mind over Stress". Big SIGH. lIKE WAT THE HELL IS TELLING WITH SOCIETY AND MIND OVER STRESS!!!!! ARGH. I mean ok, not as if the rest of the electives are not so rubbishy but I'd rather take stuff like Astronomy and Science of Jewellery or sthg. At least those are more interesting if not uesful. Big BIG SIGH. And I just realised from Louise that the humanities electives' exams are before my core exams which kinda suck coz my core for this sem is quite heavy and it is just an elective afterall wheras the exams for the science electives are 1 week after my core which means I have all the time in the world to mug for it. Sucks. Ok, I am sorry I am boring u guys with all these rantings but I am damn damn pissed off now now now!!! Argh.

ANWS. I discovered one secret about buying souvenirs. Have u ever tried buying souvenirs in the first few days of your trip and then found out later at the last few days of your trip that you cna actually get it like for half that price?! Well, I did. It might not be a lot of money, but I still feel sore over it. Imagine my pain when I saw those exact same souvenirs on display at some other place but with half the price! Haha, abit exaggerating and a bit cheapo but still. A loss is still a loss man.I am never buying souvenirs again hahahaha. Oh, anyways that was in Suzhou, we went to see this water village and it kinda reminded me of venice. There were like old ladies rowing sampans along the narrow canals and they were singing ever so melodiously. The voices kinda echoed throughout the whole village and gave it a mysterioud feel. Kinda fine in the morning, I mean it brings out the mood and all but I bet when it comes to nighttime, it definitely won't bring out any mood man. I won't wanna be there at night when they sings. Feels freaky. After that we went to the Silk Factory where we say the silkworms in action!! It was so fascinating watching the silkworms spin silk outta their cocoons and evetually become silk.

Also went boating at Hangzhou's Xi Hu (West Lake) yesterday and OH MY GOD. The view was so so so SO SO SO BREATHTAKING!!! And it was so romantic with all the fog and the mountains and the willows and the bridges and the.....wow...I took the "tourist" boat whereby u can sit in 40 ppl at one go that kind but they had those small sampans too and suddenly I envisioned myself boating along the lake with my loved one..............................................until my brother started SLEEPING!!!!! Like really lying face down and sleeping ok!!!! SUddenly I don't really feel so romantic anymore. Like how can he S-L-E-E-P under those kind of evironment!! Instead of tkaing in all the nice scenery and all, he actually slept! Not to mention that it iwas kinda cold sommore. My goodness, he really suck man.Then I had to go and spoil it all some more by getting into this huge arguement with him about how romantic it was..Blehhhhh. I hate my brother sometimes. HAHAHA. Of coz I don't but I think guys sometimes can be so UN-romantic. A lot of times they don't see the obvious. haha. Oh, apparently there is this duan qiao (broken bridge, haha direct translation. It is not really broken) that lovers will go and meet each other. Quite nice, with all the willow trees and all but then again, it might not be so romantic after all coz it is quite cold out there and they would have to wear a lot if not freeze their asses off in the cold. :)After that we went to see some pagodas, temples, tea garden and more scenery and more scenery and more scenery.....gets a bit boring already lah huh haha. I mean it is still trees and rivers and mountains and more trees, rivers and mountains afterall. But I learnt quite a lot about tea tho. Surprising that I even bothered to listen to her, maybe coz the tea lady mentioned something along the lines of tea being able to keep your complexion good or something haha. Well, that sorta wraped up all the scenery watching and it wasnt really that bad lahs, afterall, my tour guide was this young chap with damn nice brown eyes and so it wasn't too bad after all!! Except that he kinda pissed me off slightly by saying this at then end," Well hope u guys had fun and may u all be healthy and ur K-I-D-S(looks at me and my brother) have great results!!" BLEH. I AM NOT A KID OKAY!!!! I AM FREAKING 19 YEARS OLD!!!!!*fumes* Do i really look that young?!! And as if that is not enough, another lady from the sae tour group as us had to ask me whether I am from secondary school. Damnit. Doesn't mean fooling around with my brother and acting dumb means that I am like wat 15?!!! This is quite frustrating hahaa.Maybe it is a sign that I should grow up! haha Act more mature and be more serious. muahaha.

anws. shall stop here. getting a bit sleepy. *yawns* So there!

Friday, December 30, 2005 09:39 a.m.

Heh heh everybody!!! I'm in Shang-Shang-Shanghai!!! :) I must say this city is very much like Singapore, with all its shopping centres what not. Oh oH! Before I say anything more, I must say this is the first time I got chaffeured around! Haha, Daddy's boss told the company chaffeur to come and fetch us from the airport but alas, the car was to small to fit in all our luggage(we brought 3 big luggage u see), In the end all of us had to squueze into the back seat so the remanining luggage that could not be fitted into the boot can be put into the front seat!! HAHA quite pathetic eh...but still what do I expect to get..A Limo instead?!! haha the service apartment was everything I expected lah so got nothing more to say about it except that my room has a fantastic scenery of Shanghai!!A pity I did not bring my camera cable with me (due to serious miscalculations of its weight haha) so I can't upload the photos to show u!! :( My bro got this lousy room just right beside the door that totally resembles a maids room!!(except that it is bigger).MUAHAHAHAHHAHA he is damn sway thats all I can say. We did not even notice that room when we came in can! TOO bad for him lah..who ask him to be a boy, there were only 3 rooms, one of which is a master bedroom so of coz he has to take the maids room!! I am a girl lehs so must take better room with nice scenery hahahah....OK, enough of rooms...We were so tired from the ridiculously early flight (like 12 plus midnight?!!!!)so all of us just crawled right into bed when we got into the apartment haha. In the end, even tho we reached Shanghai at 6 plus in the morning, we only left to go sightseeing at 2 plus. HAIYS.

Did not really do much for day one I must say, just went to book our day tours then went to the fabric market to make clothes (apparently it is cheap there lahs) and then we went to tour the Bund at night! Walking along the Hunagpu River really reminds me of the times I took romantic strolls with David....Sighs...OKOK.there were no romantic strolls and certainly no David lahs but it is quite romantic to stroll down the Bund, minus the freaking cold winds...And it really really resembles the scenery outside esplanade! With all the tall tall commercial buildings (taller than Singapore's), the river (choppier and much much longer than Singapore's), and the night lights and all...But i guess coz it was winter and freezing and all so the number of people there were pathetic..I really wanted to take a romantic stroll down with my brother ok! But finally we all could not take the cold so we just went off to Nanjinglu for some shopping..Turns out the shopping there sucks. I can't even tell u what kinda goods they have there..just some random stuff all the way down and a few big shopping malls haha.Oh wells...maybe tommorrow we will have better luck at the imitation goods market! Quick msg me u guys! If u want some orginal fakes. Ok, heres for now!! I probably wun blog until I get back coz internet connection here is not very cheap huh..so longs!!! :)

Tuesday, December 27, 2005 10:47 a.m.

Christmas party at Chun's place!!!
haha went to Chun's place for christmas party with the Zirconians! It turned out to be qt a happy and hilarious affair esp with the drinking game that I shall tell u guys all about it later on! But coz I like to wirte my blog in chronological order so I shall start with the time I stepped into his house onwards. haha. SO. It was quite nice to see all the girls again!! Its been a while since I saw everyone together in a group..Anws,apparently the guys were outside Chun's balcony trying to set up the bbq pit and it was kinda late already haha like 7 plus 8..And as usual, cheapo weepo clement (haha i gave him that nick coz he is qt cheapo which I am sure that the rest of the girls will agree wiht me mans haha)oh yah, back to mr cheapo. haha! While the rest of the girls were happily munching on chicken, he suddenly came in and said ,"heh! time for u all to go and cook for us!!" I really can kick him at that time man!! haha..why must the girls cook during a bbq?!! why cant the guys cook?! haha thats besides the pt that they set up the bbq pit and therefore, by right, logically, we shld cook for them..but why cant they be nice and cook for us!! haha. even i feel that that's a bit too much also lahs.aiya he is just cheapo clement lahs. Later, Zhi ern, Jolynn and Yaxin, the hyper trio, started blasting CHRISTMAS music and clubbing in his living room!!! hahaha like watever lahs! Really wanna club at his living room and CHRISTMAS music sommore!!! hahah so hilarious i tell u..esp Zhi ern..She's the queen of madness man..So hyper everytime I see her!! anws, later we were sitting arnd the dining table chatting then jiaqi asked me," so, hows ur grades?" And I dunno why, but I heard it as ,"How's ur weight?" (And so did EVERYONE else there!!) I was abit stunned i must say. I mean, wat the hell!! where got ppl ask hows their weight one!!! AHAHAHHAHA. So rude!!! In the end there was like a one min silence where everyone was thinking how to respond to that question. I almost died of laughter when I knew what he actually asked me. So. after that I went to check out the bbq pit and guess wat! Chun placed this brown papaer underneath the pit to collect the ashes(dunno how come ashed can drop down from underneath his bbq pit one haha think got hole eh) and guess wat! The paper caught fire!!! We were kinda slow not to guess it coz ashes surely will light up the paper one wat! haha everyone started screaming(coz there were only girls and Chun there so it is kinda understandable )and jumping arnd coz the fire was er a bit big at first. And in all that excitement, I eneded up toppling this flowerpot!! hahahahaha..so there were ashes and soil all over his balcony! opps.we are damn sad..:)

So now..the drinking game!!!Here's how the game goes..Each numbered card means something..For example, red cards with numbers 1-5 (i think) means that the person who took the card needs to drink the number of sips as indicated by the card etc etc. The most interesting one is card number 7. That one meant that we had to invent a rule that everyone ahd to follow from then on. I invented this rule that got everyone to say "Pangsai" and "Pangpui" be4 every sentence they said and from then on, we started hearing "PANGSAI, PANGPUI, UR TURN!!!" etc. HAHAHAHHA.....IT WAS SOOOOO FUNNNY HEARING EVERYONE SAY THOSE 2 WORDS BE4 EVERY SENTENCE!!! then after that everyone started adding extra words to that and so everytime someone says something they almost have to drink everytime!! haha. oh wells. Jolynn was the most alert one, everytime catching ppl who din say the words correctly.Clement was the most unlucky one! He kept getting cards that made him drink and other ppl who got cards that cna arrow ppl to drink always arrow him to drink!!! So he ended up drinking like 1 whole bottle of 1.5l root beer!! And he did not have a toilet card!!! So he could not go to the toilet at all...so he was kinda like bent over, pressing the cushion to his tummy, trying to keep it all in!! hahahahaha.idiot.

I must say the Christmas party was quite successful! Wish u guys a very very merry lil christmas!!

Saturday, December 24, 2005 09:19 p.m.

You Were a Lizard
You are able to bounce back from adversity and regenerate what was lost.
Facing your fears and controlling your dreams comes easily for you.

What Animal Were You In a Past Life?

Wah piangs. Of all things. A lizard?!!! Yucks! I hate themand yet I am one in my previous life..haha retribution man. But I suppose this is fake lah coz when i redid it again I was something else haha duh. Anws, did another test that says what kinda age I am and it says 19!!!! WOAH. How true is that man! haha. Getting bored here.

Monday, December 19, 2005 04:45 p.m.

Digicam Mania
YAY!!!! I finally bought my first ever digicam! OMG. I must remember this day man. I have been harping on buying one since forever and I finally got it today!!! 19 December 2005!! Woohoo!! haha, dunno why I am so esctatic but heh heh it is a digicam you know! A D-I-G-I-C-A-M!!! HAHA. okok. Being irritating again.

Anws, christmas is coming!!Hmm, I like this festive of the year best, even though I do not really have any plans this year due to the fact that I am flyin off on Christmas day itself damn. Bet the flight will be so empty. Oh wells. Hope they have nice Christmas dinner on board!! muahah. I just love sitting on the airplane!! It is so fun flying like thousands of miles up in the air!! wheee!!:) But I will be freezing my ass off in Shanghai i guess..like minus degree?!! wah, can be colder than that man.Hopefully I can do some good shopping there!The only thing is that I will have to spend my new year there and not in Singapore! :( Oh wells, I will try to find nice pressies for u guys over there if I can..

Monday, December 19, 2005 04:20 p.m.

Carpark Irritant
I have just met the most ridiculous and inconsiderate driver I have ever seen in my life today. I am sure some of you have been to the parkway carpark and would know that there is only like 1 direction to drive inside the parking areas. So, me and my dad were driving around looking for one slot and we happen to come out from one lane trying to turn into another lane and this lady driver who drove on that lane happen to see the same lot as us and conveniently stopped directly in front of us waiting to park into the same lot as us!! HELLO, we were waiting there for damn long already and she just happily came along and snatched our lot away. When my dad tried to signal to her, she just gestured violently that meant along the lines of I-came-from-this-lane-so-I-should-have-the-friggin-slot kinda thing..OMG WAT KIND OF A DRIVER IS THAT!!!!! I was quite pissed, I mean wat kidna logic is that?!! Shouldn't it be, since ancient times, first come first serve?!! The reason she gave was so lame that I wanted to just laugh right at her. Then my dad, being the nice gentleman decided to just give in to her and we ended up circling the carpark looking for lots. Waste petrol and waste time. If not for Miss Inconsiderate, we would hve gotten a lot quite soon.

Then when we went into the carpark lift, another lady glared at us and shook her head when she left the lift. Like WTF!?!!!!!! Thanks a lot man, we really piss u off a lot huh huh huh?!!Wat is wrong with middle aged women we meet today?!!! Why are they so so wrong?!! Wah lau. Super pissifying I would say.

Monday, December 19, 2005 04:05 p.m.

I finally got it
I finally found the answer to my confused mind lately after reading Yanxi's blog. It just hit me when I came to the part about how me, Shiping, Alan and Bernard bring the most laughs to yesterday's gathering at Zherui's house. Then I sudenly thought of what Shiping said when we were half asleep and stil trying to keep a conversation going, that I am still quite close to the juniors since I seem to be able to play with them everytime I see them. But the truth is, despite the fact that I like fun and noise and everyone to be happy and to bring laughter to the group, I never could form a really close bond with anyone. Not as close as what some others did and defintely not as close to certain people as what Shipng thought all along. Even when I do go out with them quite often and all, I realise that I do not feel that I am "close" friend to them at all. Perhaps my expectations and definition of a close friend are much too high and complicated. More like I made it complicated myself. There is always this certain barrier, I feel that I need to overcome to accept people and tell them what I really feel about things. I am getting sick of keeping things to myself (and this is no thanks to what I experienced since young) but yes, sometimes, it gets really tiring to pretend that things are ok and that I am leading a supposedly fufilling life with friends to keep me company and for me to share my life with. It is saddening for me when I see people confiding in their best friends things that will not be otherwise disclosed to other people. Perhaps I want too much out of friendships. That is to be able to befriend everyone and yet keep a few close friends to myself. I realise that it is hard to do both things at the same time and when I attempt to do that, I seem to lose both. I think I am too tired to bother about such stuffs nowadays. I should just lay off and not bother myself with too many things be it in hall or outside. Or can I?

Hmm, I seem a little too unfeeling to be saying alll these and I am sure that my dear friends who read this entry will be shocked to find that I harbour all these thoughts all along. It is so unlike what I try to portray in front of everyone, being a goofball, a crazy kid that likes to have fun and joke around all the time. I feel like I am pretending sometimes. I mean everyone do put on a false front at times but to admit it is another thing all together. All along, I have even deceived myself to be such a cheerful person and even when I am feeling otherwise, I am too lazy to go and think it all out. But for now, I guess I am tired. Too tired. Perhaps that's why recently I've been going on and on about having a boyfriend haha myabe I just needed that someone in my life to help me straighten things out. Someone whom I can blabber all my thoughts and feelings. Someone to make me show my truest side to.

On a happier note, I must say that I really enjoyed myself yesterday at Zherui's house. It was really heartwarming in that sense to see all my dearest HC classmates and all. And all that laughter! My god, I think I have never laughed so much ever since I went into university. One thing is for sure, a combination of Alan, Shiping, Bernard and me is certainly not a good thing if they want some peace and quiet haha. And it was good to see huishan and Zsing again! But he's an idiot as usual coz the first thing he said was "Wah charlene! Did you put on weight?!!" Idiot. Idiot. Idiot. What the hell..must he realy say that EVERYTIME he sees me!! In any case, I really miss them man and I am not pretending when I say that. Seeing Zsing again also brought back fun memories of "Team Econs" ahah. All those free econs period where me, him, Bernard, Chin Siong, Ping Zhong, Seowhong, Sinhui and Wen Hooi spent not attending Oily's lessons because we dropped econs haha. Anws, I shan't launch into this whole tirade of my HC days coz I guess I have done that a tad too many times hah. Back to the gathering. Apparently, we have ordered too many pizzas (8 large canadian pizzas! to be exact! My gosh.) In the end, we could not really finish all of them. Not to mention the 3 chickens that I have brought and we finished before that. Then Zsing decided to announce that and Huishan bought $36 woth of ice cream! (that consists of 2 tubs of gelato and 2 tubs of Ben and Jerry's!! YUUMM)All of us ended up scrambling for those ice cream, especially Alan man. He was like this hungry ghost lusting over the ice cream. The look on his face I tell u when he gets hold of the ice cream....So as expected, the yummy ice-cream were wiped away in no time. After Ade, Huishan and Zsing left, the rest of us went upstairs to Zherui's room to watch 40 year old virgin and to all those who haven't watched this show yet, do not bother watching it!! I repeat, DO NOT WATCH IT!! it is really a horribly long and boring show and apart from the few and short snippets where a reasonably ok joke is made, the rest were just either plain boring or pure displays of boobs and sex. Not that the guys minded tho! (haha. my assumption lah) Which brings me to wonder why guys like watching naked women and pornography. I mean, after a while it just bores the hell outta people watching the same thing over and over again no? Oh well, that is again my assumption lah, from what I gathered watching that show and some other porn stuff(by accident ok!) and it probably would differ from person to person but still I maintain that you do not want to watch that show even if you die die also wanna watch some porn stuff haha. It is truely a thrashy show and I feel sorry for Alan who had to pay 8 bucks to sit thru it in the cinema sommore hah. Anyways, when the show was FINALLY over, there was simply nothing to do and we just laid around Zherui's room talking crap. Seowhong came too, after his class gathering and it was nice lah, all of us squeezed into one room talking about random things and trying to find a comfortable spot to lie in. Couldn't really pen down properly our conversation since it was so random and all haha so I shan't. oh oh! I suddenly remembered something damn hilarious! Ok, it so happened that Alan needed to go down to his car to get something and he was too chicken to go. So, me, Shiping and Eline went down with him. When he was walking back to the house, Shiping decided to give him a little scare and she hid behind a pillar. When Alan walk past, she suddenly booed him and guess what! Alan jumped and screamed!!!!!! MUAHAHAH. ok. He did not actually screamed lah. He just said what the f*ck. But still!!! It was so so funny I tell u watching him jump in horror and all haha. Me and Eline couldn't believe what a scaredy-cat he was and just stood there laughing like nobody's business. Ah well. stupid alan. :)

Anws, thanks Zherui for lending us your house once again! Next time we will change venue lah, to Bernard's place since he volunteered haha. Hope to see u guys again soon!

Sunday, December 18, 2005 08:20 p.m.

ROARRRRR.......King Kong RAWKS man!!!!It is fucking touching!!!! sorry, pardon the language but I never thought that an animal show can be so touuching and to think I was still comprehensive about the whole show before this leh. But oh my god....it is so damn touching! King Kong is such a sentimental person (uh..I meant animal but I think he has more feelings than many other human beings out there)There was this scene when he tried to chase after the female lead(apparently he loves that girl i think) and this bastardy asspig smashed a bottle of chlorofoam (the second one coz he smashed one on king kong before that already) onto King Kong's face!! His face!!! Pig. And then before King Kong passed out, he looked endearingly at the girl and I actually think he teared a bit!! So sad....................................

Ok, I think I am so silly gushing over a dead and ficticious animal already but I think that story is so touching and King Kong is actually a nice animal! He protected the girl from a buncha T-rexes and Bats and all!! And he is not really carnivorous haha..I mean evil animals are always carnivorous wat.He eats shoots I think. Or some branch or something. AWWW..which suddenly made me think. How nice if I could have some guy to be so nice to me tooo!!! sians. I got noone to buy christmas present for when the whole world is buying for their gf/bf. I am damn sad.

Thursday, December 15, 2005 09:31 p.m.

NTU touch rugby!
Ok. After the very depressing thought invoking entry, (for myself at least coz I came to realize many things after that blog)I jus wanna say I am proud to be aprt of the NTU touch rugby team!!! (HAH. what a 360 degree change man but it is not healthy to stay in such a depressing mode all the time)They were fantastic during the inter varsity games man! There were so much flow during every single one of the games and we did not let in a single try!! Woohoo! Well done girls!! Feel so into the team that at certain times of the games I feel like it is as if I am actually playing with them even though I would have disrupted the flow somehow or rather I guess haha. But yes....they were FANTASTIC!!! Hope that we may grow together as a team and have many many smashing times in the times ahead!

Wednesday, December 14, 2005 11:10 a.m.

I feel stifled nowadays. Be it in my capacity as a friend or an accountancy student in NTU or just being a human being. I feel like watever I do now is not what I really want to do or feel like doing but I am just doing it because it is the things that everyone does that make their life interesting. Or so they claimed. Take for example, hanging out with friends. I do not particularly enjoy going out nowadays(perhaps because I am a lazy person by nature) but then again if i do not go out, I would feel like I am wasting my life just watching TV at home. Even if I am at home and slacking online, I do not find anyone to chat online at all! SO. I feel like I am cut off from the outside world sometimes. Its all so silly but I am in this terrible terrible dilemma and I feel so horribly stifled. Its like living in 2 dimensions at the same time. I have my real world and yet there is this virtual world that I sometimes live in or aspires to live in. In the real world, I must engage myself in a lot of activities, know a lot of people and study hard to get a damn f-ing high degree, but in the virtual world, I am living in a sort of dreamland whereby degree doesnt matter and it doesnt matter to me if I do not have lots of friends or have a lot of activities. I am just me and I do whatever I wanna do without considering the consequences or anything or anyone else. Note that it is only MY thinking that I should have lots of friends, get a good degree etc etc coz there are definitely people who think otherwise. Sighs what the hell. I am stuck in this verbal diarrhoea now and I don't even think you people reading my blog understands what the hell I am talking about. But yes. One simple thing is for sure. I am so stifled now that I just wanna go to some runaway island and find a tribal boyfriend, have some tribal babies, live in a tribal hut, eat tribal food and die in the tribal land.

Coming back to the topic of having friends. I realise that at each point of one's life, there will definitely be people whom you are extremely close to and after a certain period of time that friend just fades away from your life like a certain passing cloud. OK. maybe I should just say it's a certain friend in my life lah. I must say that she is quite an important friend. It might have been my fault. I didn't spend too much time with her during the first sem because we had different different timetables and I suddenly had a buncha new friends that I wanted to get to know better and etc etc. Excuses.Excuses. So yes, we sorat drifted apart i guess. But then again, reflecting back, it seems that our meetings are so inconsistent and we do not really chat as much as she does with some other close friend of hers that it brings me to wonder whether or not we are close friends that I thought we are(or were)or is it just a one sided thing on my part all along.

I think I do not give enough emotionally to a friendship. There are a lot of things that I keep to myself and I never told anyone before. I try to tell but I can't bring myself to open myself up totally to someone. Stifling Stifling.

Wednesday, December 14, 2005 10:39 a.m.

Oh!! I really think our NTU touch rugby team is sooo cool!! Went to watch them play friendly with SAS today and I really think we are damn kinky man. Haha, thats just an espression that I use to describe how fantastic we are haha. OK, actually I can't really say we are fantastic fantastic but then like wat Anne say, I think we have TEAM COHESION!!!! woah. As in, we bond quite well off the field too and I think on the field we are really functioning as a team which is good!! Yyay!!! I feel so happy and excited for them! May they win the IVP this saturday!! Too bad I can't play with them (coz of my sprained ankle damnit) But I will go there armed with ice and food and umbrella to support them! Was also contemplating of brinking a banner there to support them! Haha, actually no. Who am I kidding man! I will look damn kuku there haha so I think not. Oh well!! No matter. We have another competition in February and I will play for that one! (I hope) So at least I can still play with people like Angel,Kehui and Dawn before they leave (muahaha, they are quite old u see so this university year will be their last year to play! I must pray that they do not read this part if not.........) anws....


Thursday, December 8, 2005 10:32 p.m.

Crowded places S-T-I-N-K!!!!!
Sucks. I do not understand why do people like to squeeze in crowded places like ZOUK!!!!!! MY GOSH. Went there yesterday and the place was freaking crowded man. Plus, the crowd is one thing, but having fun there amidst the crowd is another thing altogether! I could not really dance properly without people squeezing past me time to time. And when we thought we finally formed a nice nice circle to dance in, suddenly this 2 or 3 punks will push past us and then our circle becomes 2 straight freaking tight lines again!!!ROOAAR. (with courtesy of Alf haha)Isn't it damn pissifying?!!! In the end, I could not stand staying in phuture any longer coz i simply cannot derive any joy from dancing side to side only and so i went to mambo to find bernard and alan. Actually mambo is kinda fun too...at least u have more excuse to do silly actions to the song! muahaha. Oh wells. Hopefully people will find zouk not so fun anymore and go there less so that it will not be so crowded next time! muahaha. Probably not tho.:( Who am I kidding man.

Anws. Was out performing at tampines mall yesterday for my hall. Haha, my nerves got the better of me and i actually forgot my lyrics!!!! Luckily it was not a slow song and I could sorta fake my way thru haha. Lucky noone noticed.But it was my first time performing on sucha huge stage wat! I will be scared too. oh well.

Thursday, December 8, 2005 01:43 p.m.

The feeling to shit
Haha, have u ever got this feeling of shitting when U get excited about certain things? Well, I get that like lotsa time lah..especially when I see nice things in the departmental store like clothings and such and such. Haha, oh wells. just a sudden realization. Sorry for this very abrupt entry about my shit sommore. haha.

On a cleaner note, I wanna record down the movies that I wanna watch this hols in case I forget. (which I unfortunately always do!)

1. The Exorcist (which I hope I can watch at Zherui's house on 17th! muahah. Shall get everyone to watch with me coz I am too much of a scaredy cat to watch it myself alone! haha)

2. American Pie! (Haha, i know i know, it is a silly show with a lot of sexual content and no, I am not watching it coz of those sexual content unlike many others out there haha. I am watching it coz it is damn funny!)

3. The notebook

Ok, here's the temporary list until I think of sommore muaah.

Wednesday, December 7, 2005 02:11 p.m.

Men. Guys. Boys.
Ah, I give up man!!!! When I wanna strike up this conversation with *crush*, it willl ALWAYS end up with me saying ," ok! gtg now! cay soon!" And it is not like i really needed to go, its just that it comes to the point whereby I feel that there is absolutely nothing that we can talk about already and he do no see very interested in continuing the conversation. So, I just had to bail man. Sad rite?!! I mean not that we have nothing to talk about in school sommore. We even crack jokes and all but why the hostility online?!!! Gosh, I really have Z-E-R-O clue as to how guys operate up there when it comes to stuff like that. I give up. All those thrash about girls that take the first initiative are attractive is bullshit lah. Maybe I will marry my first love like wat my senior in Wantoks did!! She is really my idol! HAHA, all her tales about her courting this guy really inspires girls to be like her but then again I do not think that many have the guts to do it. Am I right? Sighs. How saddening. I mean myself.

Tuesday, December 6, 2005 08:05 p.m.

On the drink Virgin Mary
Finally went KTV with Alan and Shiping. It was kinda like an impromptu thing coz Alan called to ask if we wanted to o KTVing and I was like oh yes! Finally I have some excuse to go out. I mean not like I cant call people to go out but its just that with my broken leg and all, I just don't feel like going anyway actually. Its rather inconvenient and I got to realise this very much later when I was out limping around in town. ANW. the KTV wasn't that great yesterday coz the 3 of us just ran out of song to sing and we didn't particularly wanted to sing the usual songs that we sing. And K-box is lousy, I conclude. They do not have my fav new Jay Chou song!! WTF. Lousy.Lousy.Lousy.Bleh. Plus, i really do not like the male waiters (if that is what u call them there). Ok, I know that it is against your company's rules for eating outside food there and it is my fault for violating those rules but must he use a super irritating approach to keep reminding me of that fact?! Here's what happened. I was about to reach into my pack of fries when the very irritating waiter happened to walk past and stare into our room. I happened to turn my head too (unfortunately) and he nudged his head slightly to indicate my fries. I stared back at him and he just continue to stare back at me?! ARGH. OKOK, I already get his point the first time so must he really continue to stare for so long!?! Pissifying. Totally spoiled my mood for that night. Even Shiping thought it was not so nice of him to have done wat he had done. From that time onwards, our room became some blacklisted room and from time to time waiters will walk by our room to check whether we are eating again. Sians. I think I will not eat outside food inside there again to avoid such an unpleasant experience again and I will definitely not boycott that place coz it has nothing to do with the company for having such a waiter AND I definitely wun give up KTV just because of that haha. However, I do think that they could have done a better job of telling people to obey by their rules. Afterall, I am sure some other people have done the same thing before and there will definitely be people who will bring outside food to eat in there in future.
After that not-very satisfying bout of KTV, it took us (as usual)a damn long time to decide o go to Wala-Wala AT Holland V. It was then I realise I haven been there for like damn damn long! OMG. I am soo lag.Apparently they had som live band upstairs and so we went up to check it out. The band was ok I guess and I realise that most of the bands that I've heard playing in pubs and such actually sounds almost the same. You know, the usual good bands. It was damn noisy up there with the band singing and all and after we finally got to tell the waiter what we wanted, just sat there and chilled out for while, mostly becuase we could not really hear each other amidst all the noise. I am not really an avid alcohol lover so just decided to order the thing on the menu that had the most kinky name-Pussy foot. And stupid Alan ordered this order drink called Virgin Mary which turned out to be a total yucky drink. It tasted like freaking tobasco sauce!!!! UGGHHHH. I mean I do not really mind the tomato sauce thingy but TOBASCO!?!!!!!! YUCK.YUCK.DOUBLE YUCK. So then our conversation digressed to whether Alan and Bernard were virgins and becuase we did not really wanted to say the word out loud, we just kept saying things like,"So, you are not that one?" *points to the glass of virgin mary* HAHA! Quite funny in a lame sense I guess.

Ah well, I should get out more often. My socializing skills is getting rusty.

Monday, December 5, 2005 01:57 p.m.

Pictures Pictures!
Haha, been adding a lot of pic in my blog coz I finally had the heart to go chk out how to do it..and notice the background music?!Haha!

SO. Cute elephant! Guess where this is taken? At the ESPLANADE! Hahah...U should go and check it out man.

>And here's my beloved OB group!! Really must thank them for a fantastic sem in OB man! Haha, They are a damn hardworking bunch and I think if it wasn't for them I might not have gotten my A plus for that module man. (PSST..And also coz we have a teacher's boy in our grp! haha!)
Love u guys! hope we can be in the same class next sem..

On a not-so-nice note, I am completely pissed off with my dad. Haha yeah yeah I know just how I said I love him and all but why can't I go watch the Asian Sch's games tmr?! Ok, I can see his pt about me being not able to walk properly and therefore I should not go coz Turf city is not a very good place to walk in and it is damn deep in!(Woah, that was a long sentence!) BUT STILL!!! I mean i missed like a whole part of it today already and it is just the finals tmr and I wanna go watch! I MISSSSS TOUCH!!!! And besides, I've been stuck at home forever and I wanna go out!! SIGHS. I think being a parent ain't that easy esp when you are dealing with an irritating and stubborn kid like me. Oh well, I might or I might not go. Depends on whether I wanna risk pissing him off for the rest of tommorrow. :(

Saturday, December 3, 2005 08:11 p.m.

Just finished watching S.W.A.T and I must say it is an OK cops and robbers show lah. I would have watched American Pie over it if not for Colin Farrell haha. Which brings me to hot date number 2!

Simply IRRESSISTABLE don't you think!! :)

I wish I was Michelle Rodriguez! Then I can be his kickass S.W.A.T counterpart and be in action together with him! But of course, first I would have to shed some kilos and get some abs. Oh well. The cruelty of reality eh.

Saturday, December 3, 2005 06:54 p.m.

I realize that they are selling cheap tickets for RENT!!! And I cant go watch coz I cant walk! Sigh. Think it ends this weekend. Oh wells. Hope some other nice musicals or plays comes along this hols and I can go watch!

Saturday, December 3, 2005 05:58 p.m.


wOAH. Dream Lover.

Friday, December 2, 2005 11:03 p.m.

Mental Models
This is something which I learnt from Organizational Behaviour (One of the Uni modules that I had to take and if you recall one which I complained about a few blog entries back haha) But now I am going to use it to relate to something which I found rather enlightening recently. Something good. Wat an irony eh? Anws, as I was saying, I recently sprained my ankle and through that, I realize that some people are genuinely concerned about it. I mean it is nothing great seriously, since I always sprain my ankle so for those who know me well couldn't really be bothered about it haha. However, this particular person showed me tremendous concern and did things that I never thought she would do to help my sprained ankle. Before ppl started telling me bad stuff about her, I was kinda neutral about her as a friend. But then people started telling me things like ," Oh, she is really irritating at times and flirts a lot etc." After that, my impression of her totally changed and I started to notice the things that people say she always does that was kinda, well, not so nice. Ok, I am a really blur person who is damn oblivious to my surroundings so sometimes I can be a bit slow to such things. Gradually, I started to form a very negative mental model about her and I even started gossiping about her. She became this flirt and pesky person in my mind. (Come to think of it, I am sucha fool to be manipulated by what others thought of her) HOWEVER, after the little things that she done for me, I suddenly feel like a jackass for thinking so negatively about her. Hmm..I think I am wierd eh? And perhaps U might think that I am quite shallow to think that way. But in any case isn't it a good thing? I mean it IS better to think well of a person than otherwise, no? Anws, I am off to watch "Jewel in the palace"..So there!

Friday, December 2, 2005 10:07 p.m.

Jazzy Tazzy
OO...Listenng to "Crazy" by Julio Iglesias immediately got me into this super romantic jazzy mood where I just wanna waltz my life away with the love of my life.(Though the face is kinda fuzzy due to the simple fact that I do not have any candidate now in particular ahha) Think smoke, nice gowns and all. Woah.

And Dave Koz is my second Kenny G.

Friday, December 2, 2005 04:27 p.m.

I wanna clubbbbbbb!!
I must be mad. I already have this strong desire to go clubbing and yet I am listening to clubbing songs!!!! ARGH. Freak. I should stop it. HAHAH. BUt I can't help it! Feel quite silly sitting on the sofa and grooving away to the music. Oh, how I miss it! Hmph. Bet Shiping had a lot of fun at mammbo on Wednesday. :( HAIYAS. I am damn loser. All I can do is to complain and complain and comlain on my blog. Haha, I just realized I blog 4 times yesterday!!! WOah. I was never THAT hardworking in updating my blog man. (Coz if you check back, there was once where I left it dormant for 6 months haha) Boredom really drives me to do the most amazing things.

Friday, December 2, 2005 10.04p.m.

The best dad in the world
I think I wrote something about my dad being the best in the world before and I am going to write it again! OK, here's why I say so.

Me: "Wah, dad! You bought so much duck home today!"

Dad: "Yeah."

Me: "So what's the special ocassion?"

Dad: "You said You wanted to eat duck from that place wat so I went to buy."

Me: "Huh? When did I say I wanted to eat duck?!"

Dad: "Remember? You said you wanted to eat the duck from that ulu place in Buona Vista wat."

OK. I thought. Since when did I said I wanted to eat duck?! Then it suddenly struck me. Oh yah! I did say I wanted to eat duck this morning in the car when he took me to the sinseh! But that was just a casual remark wat! And he actually remembered!?! Wow. My dad really dotes on me man. I was damn damn damn SUPER touched when he said that.


I don't even remember saying that and he actually did!! Muahahahah. Jealous?! You should be!:D

Thursday, December 1, 2005 09:06 p.m.

A sweet sweet christmas show
AWWWW....I just finished seeing this really sweet christmas show! It is about this woman who crashes her car and gets suddenly fast forward to like 10 years later. So she suddenly finds herself married with 2 kids, head of some charitable oragnisation and a staunch Christian when before the car crash she was this materialistic free thinker who had one hell of a career and drives a S type jaguar. One of the more touching scenes was when her 8 year old (I presume) "son" served food to this old man who was suffering from some disease (which I cannot remember what) which rendered him unable to use the utensil properly. So her kid cuts up the food for the old man. It might sound a bit "So what?" to some but I am a sucker for such things, so there. I think the worst thing was she could not even remember her husband and yet her husband still treats her so nicely and was so incredibly sweet to her! In the end, when she finally "loved" her husband again and kisses him, she returns to the time when she just crashed her car. She opened her eyes and saw her husband. Then she said,

"Oh my god, it's you!"

And then her husband replied," Have I ever met you before?"

And she said," No, but I know I have loved you all my life."

AWWWWW.....Isn't that sweet?! Imagine if you are the husband and some girl whom you saved from a car crash tells you that. What a fairy tale come true. :) OK. I am officially nuts. HAHA.

Thursday, December 1, 2005 04:55 p.m.

My brother's girlfriend's 16th brithday
Haha, sounds like a really long relation eh? You might think what has that gotta do with me but the process of him planning for her birthday was so hilarious that I decided to blog it down. Maybe this is what other boys do for their girlfriend's birthday and maybe, one day, IF, I am in his girlfriend's postition and my boyfriend decides to plan a incredibly romantic birthday for me, I will be damn touched and cry too. But to feel that way now is kinda impossible not when it involves my kiddo brother whom I never thought was mentally capable of doing such a sweet thing! HAHA. I must sound like a really really bad sister here to say all that of my brother but heh, I still love him all the same and all I am saying here is that he is growing up.

Anyway, back to the PROCESS. He did this 2m by 2m heart shape cusion for her. Mind you, it's all hand made, with the exception of the sewing part coz he totally screwed up many times and pricked his dear dear fingers. In the end, he had no choice but to get some old grandmother near my house to sew it for him haha. I can only say, ah, the power of love. And he even bothered to cut out his girlfriend's name in the middle of the cushion and used plastic to cover it up! HAHA. I never imagined my brother had so much artistic sense. Hmm...from what I can remember, all his art pieces were done by my mother haha. SO. The funniest part of the whole thing was that he actually forgot to get money from my parents and so he had like zero cent on him that day. He got soooo panicky coz he still needed to buy flowers, cake etc etc. I had to dig out whatever money I had in order for him to complete his present and buy whatever props he needed to prepare for her birthday!! Sighs. hah. So when everything was ready, it was time to set off to the destination of love! He even got his friend to film the process of him setting up the candles on the beach, only that the wind happened to be quite strong on that day and kept blowing out the candles!!! MUAHAHAH. But what a nice friend he has I must say. In the end, he said they spent like 1 plus hr lighting the freaking candles. HAHA! Once again, ah, the power of love! Ah wells. I must be mad to blog all this down haha. ANWS. Thats all for boring day number 2 I guess. Until then, have fun, all u lucky shits out there. :D

Thursday, December 1, 2005 03:54 p.m.

Boredom looms.
Sighs. My hols is totally ruined thats all I can say. First my allergy that required me to stay at home for 4 freaking days coz I decided I was too ugly to go out. THEN now my sprained ankle. Damnit. I am sick of watching TV at home (something which is rather rare coz i simply love being a couch potato. But when I have to do it for like 5 consecutive days straight, somehow or rather it robs all the fun away.) and I am sick of bingeing at home all because I have simply nothing to do. On top of all that, I am sick of all the physical inconvenience when my ankle is all wrapped up and I can't walk on it AT ALL. First inconvenience, walking. I am just hopping around now on my right foot and it is really tiring to move from the sofa in the living room to my room now. Second inconvenience, bathing. I have to wrap my injured ankle in plastic bag and lift my leg up when I bathe so that the water will not get to my ankle. Do you know how f-ing tiring that is?!!! Haha, maybe coz I take quite some time to bathe too so it is rather strenous on my right foot. Last and the funniest inconvenience, is that I can only wear my underwear while sitting down!! Haha, I found taht rather amusing coz that problem never occured to me the many previous times when I sprained my ankle as it was so bad that I could not even stand on it. So I had to seat on the toilet bowl and do it, which totally pisses me off too coz I feel so helpless. Funny that I can feel both amused yet pissed at the same time. Oh wells.

And I just remembered that I can't go to the NBS bash tommorrow!!!! ARRRGH. Of all things. I do not mind not going to mambo yesterday even tho the whole freaking world was there. I do not mind not being able to go out and have fun when everyone else is. I do not even mind not going for the friendly today. I do not even mind going to Robinsons tommorrow for the French Butler reception (??!!) to see cute waiters. BUT, why of all things must I skip the bash tommorrow!!! HE is going to be there!!!! ARGH. watever. I think I am ranting too much. Come to think of it, it is MY fault that I am in such a state now.

Thursday, December 1, 2005 03:28 p.m.

My Grown up Christmas List
Monica - My Grown Up Christmas List

Do you remember me?
I sat upon your knee
I wrote to you with childhood fantasies
Well I'm all grown up now
Can you still help somehow?
I'm not a child but my heart still can dream

So here's my lifeful wish
My grown up Christmas List
Not for myself
But for a world in need

No more lives torn apart
That wars will never start
And time will heal our hearts
Every man will have a friend
That right will always win
And love will never end
This is my grown up Christmas List

May kindness rules our lives
Not just the strong survive
Sweet tears for all the thousand years on mind
This is the world I pray
We will all share some way
Help me begin by reaching out my hand

No more lives torn apart
That wars will never start
And time will heal our hearts
Every man will have a friend
That right will always win
And love will never end
This is my grown up Christmas List

Why does this illusion call the innocence of you?
Maybe when the time believe we can find the truth

No more lives torn apart
That wars will never start
And time will heal our hearts
Every man will have a friend
That right will always win
And love will never end
This is my grown up Christmas List

This is the prayer that I will keep
This is my grown up Christmas list
Christmas list

Thursday, December 1, 2005 01:48 p.m.

I sprained my fucking ankle again. Damnit. So while I SHOULD be out there having fun and going to zouk tonight, the whole f-ing world is going today!!!! But instead I am stuck at home watching some stupid cop show!!!!!! ROAR. I am damn pissed now. Should not have been so itchy leg and played with the wantoks ppl yesterday night. Now, I can't train and can't go for the fiendly tommorrow!!!! Hopefully my leg will heal by next week so I can resume training. SIIANS. How untimely man.

Wednesday, November 30, 2005 08:27 p.m.

ATM card
I can't BELIEVE I lost my freaking ATM card again!!!!!! And I barely held on to my new one for like what 4 DAYS?!!!!! My goodness. I am a total blur queen man. I just lost my previous one and made a new one on last Monday and I lost it on Thursday that same week!!ARGH. Now I have to donate like 5 bucks to POSB for making me a new card. Can't imagine if my dad finds out about this. I will be possibly grounded forever and ever. And the best part about the whole incident was that I THOUGHT I did not cancel my transaction before I walked off from he ATM machine.

Totally freaked the hell outta me I tell you

I think I must have looked quite scary (my sunburnt face did not help much) sitting at the MRT calling POSB and trying to convince the lady customer service operator that I AM the owner of my account. I mean I was already sooo scared that someone behind me that day would just draw all my money and abscond with it lah and she had to ask me ," So, is this a joint account or just your account?" "What is your account number?" Like WTF?! I wanted to ust scream at her.


haha. biatch. I meant myself. But you can't really blame me for it though! Desperate times calls for desperate reactions. Haha. Made that up myself. But I guess I must be fair to that lady. She was super nice to me on the phone, very patiently explaining to me stuff that at the end of the call, I calmed down and when I saw my reflection on the MRT door, I thought I saw Goddess of Mercy haha.Ok. That was incredibly UN-necessary. Kudos to nice customer service officers though! (And it helps to have a soothing voice.)Anyways, I am just glad that the whole ATM saga is over. The only thing now is that I have to walk like 4 street to the bank to make a new card. Sighs.

On a lighter note, ok maybe not so light considering that it was quite a bad experience. I dreamt that I scored ADEF for my exams!!!!! Gosh. What is wrong with me man. I must have been thinking too much about my results coz according to reliable sources, dreams are part of one's subconscious mind. It really brought back "memorable" memoreies of my post results days in JC. I was a really not-so-hardworing student and mostly got grade Os for my exams! haha suddenly remembered this incident before our A levels when our teacher made us write down our results throughout our 2 years in JC and when I was down with it, I realised that I had written O (not the number zero but the grade "O") in most of the boxes!!!aahahahaha. Quite funny. I mean like at least people had like a mixture of grades but I only had Os! Luckily I managed to scrap through my As with good enought grades to get into NTU. whew. Really close shave. Actually, I wasn't such a slack student. I was like quite hardworking during my Primary and Secondary school days ok! How many people actually finished 2 books of TYS for each subject and redid them all over again for my O levels! Not to mention doing heaps and heaps of papers from other schools. HAH! Beat that man!

Sad to say, my passion for mugging just simply went kaput when I went into JC. Do not ask me why. However, I did not regret not working a bit harder and getting better grades and stuff like that coz I would have still ended up where I am today. Ok. Perhaps some might argue that I could have gotten a scolarship and go overseas or getting better results is somewhat like a personal achievement. Or they just feel that I was just plain lucky. (HEH, I worked my arse off for the 1 plus month before As ok! haha) But soon, I guess I just cannot see the point of working so hard for that A on my result slip anymore. To think I was so xiong1 yong3 da4 zhi4 when I first got into JC and wanted to get a scholarship to go overseas to study psychology. Hiak Hiak.

Ah wells. What's the point of saying so much now when everything is over? Haha. It doesnt matter to me what. Hopefully something will happen along the way and fuel my passion for accountancy so that I will not die of boredom working as an accountant 3 years down the road.

Sunday, November 27, 2005 07:35 p.m.

It's funny how a name can invoke such incredible emotions in me. And the funny thing was I merely saw it thru another person's sms. HMM. I need to rethink whatever that I have figured out previously. Now it's all jumbled up because of that sms.

Monday, November 21, 2005 12:37 p.m.

Mr Lizard
OH MY GOD!!! THERE IS A FREAKING LIZARD IN MY ROOM! and just when my brother was about to catch it, it actually knew how to hide behind the cupboard!!! Now, how smart can it be. WHICH MEANS. i have to sleep with it tonight?!!? OK. i think i sound damn bimbotic here but I really can't stand the sight of lizards man. especially after I spent like 14 weeks with them in my hall. Let me tell you, the lizards in my hall are the wierdest looking lizards i have ever seen. They are translucent and their eyes are big, black and shiny! Not only that, they are one noisy bunch and it was only after I went to NTU did I know that lizards actually make sounds! W-O-A-H. Good Luck to me tonight. If that stupid thing ever come close to my bed (not that I will know anyway), I will..I will...well..when that time comes then I will decide what to do with it.

Sunday, November 20, 2005 11:30 p.m.

Wierd dream
I just woke up from a very wierd dream!!!!! In this dream, I was out fighting demons (in the human form) with a buncha people and for the final unltimate stunt, when I finally met the demon boss, I plunged a wood into him and did some north south east west spell on him and he finally exploded!!!!! And then, which is the funniest part of all, me and my fellow demon squashers actually converted all his demon followers into guess what?

nuns and monks!!!!!! Like WATEVER lah! Not that I have anything against monks and nuns but the whole dream is soooo incredibly lame that I could not believe I actually dreamt it!! Oh my. I must be damn bored, even in my dreams. Sians. And I can't eat my Korean bbq coz of my stupid stupid lip allergy!!! ARGHHH.How screwed up can my post exam days be! :(

Saturday, November 19, 2005 08:49 p.m.

S-I-G-H-S. I can't believe that I am stuck at home playing freaking hearts just barely 4 days after my exams!! I should be out there shopping my heart out! Damn. All thanks to the stupid lip allergy again. And I had to skip training this morning becuase of that! Oh mans. This suck. Reminds me of SP night.Haha! Sorry SP for frightening you with my goldfish lips. Oh well.

ANWS. I think Emily Rose is freaking scary!!!!!!!!!OK, only the bits when Emily Rose actually contorts her body to some wierd angles.HAHA, I can't believe Jolynn, Yaxin and Zhi Ern could not sleep that night all because of that movie! HAH! I almost died when they told me that the next morning!! And the most hilarious thing was that after the movie, when we realised that we had to go back to the scary carpark beside Crown Prince hotel to get Jolynn's car, we freaked out even more! Haha, her car was the ONLY one left in the car park sommore. But I really must must must watch the Exorcist!! Heard its 100 times scarier than this! Oh mans. But I must watch it in the presence of at least 20 people, if not I think I won't make it past the first 5 minutes of the show! HAHA.

Our OG went to sentosa yesterday and letme tell you the go cart there is DAMN DAMN DAMN FREAKING funnnnnn!!!! :) It was so thrilling to be speeding down the slopes and all!! And the stupid guys did not want to accompany us to take it coz they nonchalantly said that it was the same as driving a car and there was nothing interesting about it. HMPH. fine. In the end, only Peiyao and Zhi Wei accompanied us! So niiice of them! The rest of the guys are gays! hahahah. So never irritate a woman.We took wuite a few funny pics too and it is all Jolynn's idea lah! Doing wierd stuff by the stupid coconut trees , posing as a buncha Miss Singapore Universe contestants by a row of canoes (Like watever lah!! By the CANOES?!!!) AND THEN asking the guys to do the same!! ahah and as usual, being the usual MCPs they are, only chun did suck it in and stuck his chest out, posing like a true paegent contestant!! From what I see, I think he is good enough to join the Miss Universe contest! HAH. Went watch Harry Potter after that and it was a bit disappointing :( Not as exciting as I imagined it to be when I read the book. This is what happens when I read the book before I saw the show, coz when it contradicts what I thought out the scene to be while reading it, it makes the whole show less fun to watch! HAHA. wierd. That's why I liked the first one the best coz I saw the show before I even read the book. Oh well.

I have a sudden urge to eat Korean BBQ! I wun even mind seoul Gardens! AHAH. How desperate. AHHH....I am dying of boredom here. I guess I shall go and watch some TV. Maybe I will just fall asleep and forget all about my boredom.

Saturday, November 19, 2005 04:11 p.m.

Just a certain reflection on a certain something
Very often somebody will piss somebody off and that somebody will not even know that he/she has pissed the other somebody off because that somebody did not say anything nor show any displeasure or whatsoever!! What is the world coming to! OK. Nthat i didn't know that the world already functioned like that for thousands of years but YES, can someone start to wake up their idea( haha now where i i hear THAT from?!)and just SAY if they are not happy?!! Why keep it to themselves then bitch about that person behind that someone's back?! It doesnt make much sense and it is not so nice to do that either. Oh well. maybe coz by telling that somebody "You are such a b*tch" right in their face isnt that nice either and could possibly send off the worst signals to that person too. SO. what to do then if we cant tell and neither is it moral to talk abt ppl behind their back?! Worst still, boycott that person altogether. I guess human relations ain't the easiest thing to manage. Even more than managing a multibillion company.

Friday, November 11, 2005 02:48 p.m.

I was jolted up from my sleep by 2 words. "Organizational change". DAMNIT. i just realised that i did not include a damn important pt in my essay qn and it determines the fate of my OB grade.(or so i think) drat it. now i cant slp.

Wednesday, November 9, 2005 12:26 a.m.

I wanna sing KTV!! it just suddenly struck me while listening to jay chou's songs (funnily). its been a long time since i last went! just too busy with sch work and other stuff(which i cant seem to rem). haha so who is game for it! my exams finish next tues!! :)

speaking of which i think OB is totally CRAAAAAPPP!!!(For those who do take it, (thank god!), it is actually organizational behaviour....) i simply dun see the pt in studying that. not like i will rem most of the theories that i studied in that stupid bk of mine! wat expectancy model, MARS model etc etc. i mean i dun mind studying and taking the exam BUT wats the p if u do not give the students time to THINK abt their ans!!! 2 hrs is simply atrocious for 5 essay qns! like WTF. i can only manage 1 pg answers for each part of the freaking qn. :( ah wells. no use complaining here. maybe coz its the first paper thats why! haha (Attribution theory, muahaha.)hopefully my other papers will be better, tho i seriously doubt so. like IT, biz law and econs?!!! i thought i was rid of econs after i dropped it in JC but NOOOOOO...it has come back to HAUNT me!!!!! :(which totally sucks coz i need to cramp in like 2 yrs worth of JC econs plus a bit more in like wat 4 days?!!! oh my oh my..pls pls pls let it be easy. at least i feel better taking the paper even if at the end of that day the marks are computed using the stupid bell curve. oh well.talk abt deceiving myself man.

anw i am planning for my hols already!!!! YAY!!! haha act it was aft i heard yaxin said that she had already planned hers! she really had to get me all excited abt it in the midst of my exams man!hopefully i can go to aust!! (pls pls let there be no terrorist attack) and i MUST go to gold coast this time! MUST!! Can u believe that i have been there 4 freaking times and have NEVER EVER come 2 miles within the radius of it!!! haha.sighs.

time for dinner! and its back to the BKS after that :( wish me luck!

Tuesday, November 8, 2005 06:47 p.m.

HAHA..no its not the show. I just wanna write something but do not know what to write. Its one of those days where u just feel so lost coz u do not know what to do! Its not like I have nothing to do, in fact i've got lots of stuff to cramp in for exams..still..freak it. its just one of those days. argh. someone quick msg me or call me! so that maybe I will have some clue.

Friday, October 28, 2005 03:41 p.m.

We Belong Together

I didn't mean it
When I said I didn't love you, so
I should have held on tight
I never shoulda let you go
I didn't know nothing
I was stupid, I was foolish
I was lying to myself
I could not fathom that I would ever
Be without your love
Never imagined I'd be
Sitting here beside myself
Cause I didn't know you
Cause I didn't know me
But I thought I knew everything
I never felt

The feeling that I'm feeling
Now that I don't hear your voice
Or have your touch and kiss your lips
Cause I don't have a choice
Oh, what I wouldn't give
To have you lying by my side
Right here, cause baby
(We belong together)

When you left I lost a part of me
It's still so hard to believe
Come back baby, please
Cause we belong together

Who else am I gon' lean on
When times get rough
Who's gonna talk to me on the phone
Till the sun comes up
Who's gonna take your place
There ain't nobody better
Oh, baby baby, we belong together

I can't sleep at night
When you are on my mind
Bobby Womack's on the radio
Saying to me
"If you think you're lonely now"
Wait a minute
This is too deep (too deep)
I gotta change the station
So I turn the dial
Trying to catch a break
And then I hear Babyface
I only think of you
And it's breaking my heart
I'm trying to keep it together
But I'm falling apart

I'm feeling all out of my element
I'm throwing things, crying
Trying to figure out
Where the hell I went wrong
The pain reflected in this song
It ain't even half of what
I'm feeling inside
I need you
Need you back in my life, baby

Friday, October 14, 2005 09:46 p.m.

My fat bro has a girlfriend!!!!
wah laus.....my brother has a girlfriend!!!! hahah ok he just dropped me this bombshell like last night. i was quite shock to say the least coz he isnt exactly the most handsome and hot guy arnd(oppss!!haha) but actually it is not because of those reasons of coz...i guess it is just wierd.it is like watching your younger borther getting married before u lah..sians. haha i am sounding so serious! cant stand myelf sometimes.oh wells... but i'm happy for him.. at least he is more hardworking now! haha coz his girlfriend is smarter than him..so i guess it spurs him to work harder!
playing touch rugby is getting more and more therepeutic for me. i feel so much happier when i am playing touch and it really relieves the stress from nearing deadlines and the workloads of school work. too bad the touch season is ending and i cant play in wantoks until next yr. I really enjoyed going OFS every tues and thurs to hang out and play with the ppl there! oh wells...lucky there is still NTU! :)hopefully we can join the Asian games at the end of the yr! its gonna be sooo exciting! haha...ah wells..oh before i go..just wanna wish all the 69 jnrs, my touch jnrs and every other ppl having prelims now all the best!!!

Wednesday, September 14, 2005 11:52 p.m.

I need to grow up man
hey guys!! i am finally back!! haha uni has been fun so far...LOSTA freedom man!esp if u stay in hall like me!!haha but ok i am trying hard not to play so much in case i forget all about my studies again like in JC. i guess its because of that that sometimes it kills all the fun because i have to think twice about joining some stuff in school. ah wells...i guess its all about giving and taking.in any case, work is really starting to pile up and time really flies coz i just realize that i m in the middle of my semester and in 6- more weeks time i am taking my final exams!! (ARGHH!!!)It's really scary come to think of it...i mean there are quite a lot of stuff to cover...and this sem is SUPPOSED to be my slacker sem since next sem i have to take stats(yuck), finance(even more yucky) and accounting!!!(the yuckiest of all) sighs.. i think i am in the wrong course man! haha our tutor made us take this MBTI test whereby there are certain combinations of characters/traits that accountants shld have and i am the complete opposite!! haha its kinda funny since most of my classmates actually have the same or similar combintions show that they are cut out to be an accountant.my oh my...but anw this test isnt THAT accurate according to my teacher as supposedly your combination can change as you grow old so perhaps in the near future i might soon have the thing to be an accountant!haha
MAF is coming soon!! yay! i am finally going back to hwa chong after god knows how long! i kinda miss HC and the class man...i even brought all my JC photos to stick in my room! wah really missed the class and everyone in school...JC seems the most fun coz at least u still have your class and friendships are more lasting since we know each other for 2 yrs wheras in uni i m mostly alone..lucky i found a few friends that i can hang around with..i guess i am not ready to grow old and take on so many responsibilities all of a sudden..it's like before i go uni i dun have to decide on so many stuff but in uni its like i have to be in control of my life all the time. haha i m still like a kid man..I NEVER WANNA GROW OLD! haha ah well.hopefully i can still keep in contact with 69 and everybody else that i know in HC coz those are the firendships that i m starting to miss and don't wanna lose.

Thurs, September 1, 2005 04:43 p.m.

been having nightmares recently..and it is always the same thing..aboout how everyone has moved on in their lives and i cant because i simply have no idea wat i wanna do next time. results gonna be out in a month's time and i am scared i must admit.i am not sure how much my 1 year of playing when i was in j1 is gonna cost me. i hope not too heavily. i dared not think about my future recently. everyone keeps asking me what i am gonna do in univeristy and i'm like "oh maybe accountancy or business". but i know deep down inside i really have no clue if that is what i really want. i do not even know whether i will make it. all the "what ifs" keeps going round and round my head...........i have come to a point in my life when i need ot start and i really mean seriously think about my future. i can no longer just chuck it at the back of my head, thinking that all i need ot do is just study and get good results. It is more than that now. i can no longer live in a world of fantasy anymore. sure the perioud after As was really fun, when i need not think about anything..but as the days draw nearer and nearer, i cant help but worry. Am i the only lost one?!

Sunday, February 6, 2005 10:41 p.m.

arrgh...i am absolutely unlucky today!! was thinking like maybe i could cheat a bit today and go for a longer break since wenting is near my office(you see we have like 15 mins break before and after lunch..and we must not exceed the time given to us or else......)so, A helped me tell B to help me log back in the given number on the phone.(we have different numbers to press on the phone if we do different things u see..go for break is no. 1, doing work is no. 8 etc etc..damn troublesome..)BUT..the HR people decided to look for me regarding my MC at around the same time and so when they realize i wasnt at my seat they tracked me through the phone system and found that i was away for 20 plus mins!! arghh...talk about good timing..of all the times in the day they really had to choose the time when i decide to slack!! arghh..so irritating..i mean there are so many people in the call centre so there was no way they would have noticed i was gone!! the chances are like 1 in a 100000000000000000 million! i just have to say i was dman damn unlucky...haha then me and stella got called up by the supervisors(coz both of us were in this together! haha) and i was even warned by the HR person!! she was like "if you ever do it again..........." followed by THE killer look. yah and i can guess the consequences.

sighs. how sad. my first attempt and i got caught. haha i think i am forever blacklisted by them.and the worst thing of it all is that i am so paronoid now that i keep checking the time each time i go out to make sure i come back on time!!i would rush to the toilet (like i am forever urgent) and to make matters worse my supervisor is sitting right in front of me so i keep getting this feeling that i am being watched by her!!!! oh mans...i m so so screwed. i cant work in peace without getting all jumpy each time i see my supervisor sit in front of her comp thinking that she is tracking me! haha

oh wells...i guess the only consolation for the day was that i get to go shopping at night! well not that i bought a lot of stuff to say the truth it was pretty unsatisfying but i got to see sthg interesting! Joyce and i were walking towards orchard towers when we saw this lady suddenly walk up to this caucasian guy who was walking past and chatted with him while he walked(she was so smooth and fast that we thought that she was his girlfriend!! It was only after she suddenly broke away from him that we realize she was not. well you can guess as much. i mean i've never seen someone done it in action before so i was a bit amazed. haha even though i live so near the red light district i've only seen them around. i wanted to go nearer to listen but it would have seemed too wierd. i mean i cant possibly drag joyce to walk near them so that i could listen! i would need to be real near and it would be pretty obvious what i was trying to do!i think i am being a little discriminating here. not like they can help it.

Tuesday, January 25, 2005 11:23 p.m.

Meet the Folks
just finished watching meet my folks and it just amazes me how much fun i derive from watching it. i mean i cant really know if much of it is true coz it really doesnt seem to have much reality in it even though the name suggests otherwise..or does it? haha but heck..i still enjoyed watching it (even though a huge part of it is attributed to the fact that the son is quite cute and that the girl he likes and got chosen in the end is the prettiest of the lot so its kinda like a fairy tale ending)but oh well..name me one person who hates to see happy endings!!either that person is a liar or just a really erm wierd person. But i guess whats so entertaining about the show is that there are always surprises! At the beginning of the show the 3 girls were made to perform a task even before they meet the parents.While one girl had to say "word" before each sentence(haha everyone was like "ok..so this girl has a wierd lingo"!oh man..)another had to squeeze the dad's butt when she greeted him for the first time!!! haha can imagine how shocked the dad was!!i must say she really set a first good impression on the father..if it was my dad he wld prob freaked out and faint on the spot!!! and my mum.............ahahahahah!!yeah u can imainge....oh but i really felt sorry for the girls when their ex boyfriends came out dressed as waiters in the middle of a dinner party and dished out all their dirty little secrets in front of everyone!! woah...and the worse thing was the girls had to sit beside their ex and listen to them bitch about themselves!ouch...and i felt like slapping this particular ex...he was having soooo much fun describing how that girl loves money..rich guys...etc etc! arrgh.....not that i pitied the girl(coz there might be some truth in it) but i think its no way to treat your ex..a classic example of a first class jerk. i mean at least the rest had a straight face and one even had that "i'm so sorry that i bitched about u" kinda look after that.

anyway, after watching the show i suddenly felt that people are always so judgemental...and they always judge someone based on their past and on the outside.(dont be too quick to say no! coz we are ALL guilty of that)first impression counts a lot and its always easy to make a mistake and make people detest you than for you to atone for your bad past and get on with your life. It would be as hard as if you had a one month constipation and suffer everyday for that month but when finally you do let it all out,nothing, simply nothing can deprive you of that sense of truimph and absolute happines.At least thats how i felt.

Monday, January 24, 2005 04:11 a.m.

went to our company's dinner and dance today oh my...the host was damn funny! He was a trans and his jokes were all quite dirty...everything seems to revolve around drags..sex...etc etc but they were all cleverly said i must say haha..later 2 of his/her friends came and one of them begun singing and going arnd sticking her boobs into the guys faces! oh man....how horrifying!! haha..the only pathetic thing was that our table only had 3 of us!!! hahas damn sad rite..but cant be helped lahs think we were the only temp young staff there and we din really know many ppl there!so we just kept eating and eating!! oh man felt like a glutton..haha buffet wat.:)oh then there were this 2 guys who came later and sat our table..one of them got nice eyes!! Its really hard to find guys with nice eyes.. but too bad he is shorter than me!!! hahahah..after that went with wenting and stella to meet regina at music underground and we got free entry coz regina's uncle is a bouncer there before!!! how cool is that! having an uncle who is a bouncer haha..and i must say we were quite unlucky! coz there are like 2 sections...one is where a live band is playing the other is actually the dance floor and wherever we go the music sucked but when we left that place suddenly all the better music comes on!! oh man.....haha!

Sunday, January 23, 2005 10:16 p.m.

dark dark blog
oh no!!! my blog is damn dark! or is it just the company's lousy computer that i am using now haha! can everyone go acces to my blog and tell me if it is really that dark!! sighs.....hahahs.

Wednesday, January 12, 2005 11:38 a.m.

Wednesday, January 12, 2005 11:34 a.m.

friends are hard to keep.
People say that one only need to have a few good frends in their life but how very often are we lucky enough to find those frends?i realize that i actually do not have people that i can really talk to.ok maybe like 1 or 2. People are drifting away from me or am i actually the one drifting away from them? or is it just a one sided friendship all along? Now i can understand why we should always make it a point to try and keep contact with ur cherished frends.coz if u just want to be the receiving end wating for people to come to you, it never really happens.Frends whom i thought were my good frends,people whom i used to be able to share my thoughts with are gradually fading away from my life.maybe i asked for too much.but is it too much to ask for them to cherish the friendship as much as i did? or maybe i haven't done enough to give them such an impression.or maybe i just simply did not allow them to come into my inner world.But why is it that i feel i can no longer depend on any one anymore?in any case if you had such a frend whom u always find first whenever something happens to you be it good or bad or frends who always seem to be there when u are sad or happy or just simply frends who cherish ur friendship never let it go.hold it on to them becuase u might never find another one like him or her.

Tuesday, January 11, 2005 11:16 p.m.

my life is indead pathetic.up till now i have no goals in life or no inkling what am i to do in the future.looking at ppl who have goals of their own and plans for the future i feel small.perhaps i am just not making an effort to find out what i really want.or perhaps i am just afraid to face up to the future. i m so lost. or perhaps i didn't have a direction in life to begin with.

Tuesday, December 28, 2004 12:05 a.m.

Wahs i am NEVER gonna play zhong ji mi ma anymore! had a tough time trying to finish the fd haha esp the salad thing ..sighs shldnt have added in so much salad dressing! i am not touching salad for a long long time...haha but i think nelson had the worst fd..poor guy..when its his turn to eat sthg he always seem to get the most disgusting one..no thanks to seow hong! hahahaa
but i think the christmas party at zherui's hse was well spent.even though a couple of ppl are missing but i think it is great when all of us are together! seems like we are still a class once more. all the silly things we do like forcing tat hua to use the red hse instead of the usual figurine to play monopoly reminded me of the times when all the girls bully him..seow hong mixing the fd to play zhong ji mi ma and switching ade's card during murderer until she got so confused that she dunno wat's wat anymore reminded me of the times when he was being a pest irritating everyone in class haha..zherui being forever witty as usual..the guys who are so obssesed with computer games reminded me of the time when we went to sentosa and the dumped us to go play lan!!(even up till now i still remembered that incident.. goes to show how deep the damage was haha..i will always remember the times we spent together as a class and how u guys always put up with my claiming to be the prettiest in the whole wide world etc etc..the memories will never fade away and i will never forget u guys.
its really hard to describe happinees and everything happy that comes my way but just remembering them is enough.when i got back hm i looked up and suddenly i saw the prettiest clouds.it never hit me more clearly until then that my life has changed once again.

Monday, December 27, 2004 12:05 a.m.

Life is fragile, i conlcuded.People only regret when things come to and end. Damn it. wats the pt of me saying all this now. i guess i just needed to say all these to elevate the guilt in me.

Sunday, July 25, 2004 11:00 p.m.

Life is fragile, i conlcuded.People only regret when things come to and end. Damn it. wats the pt of me saying all this now. i guess i just needed to say all these to elevate the guilt in me.

Sunday, July 25, 2004 10:28 p.m.

The Odd Couple
ooo..went to watch this annual ELDDFS production "The ODD Couple" and it was hilarious!!!! it's a waste if u haven watch it! i esp enjoyed the part when the 2 actors came out as some spanish brothers! hahhas...they really crack me up! always have some funny wierd espression that is simply a joy to watch! anw, my nite certainly ended off nicely despite the fact that i was a BIIIT traumatised by the afternoon's event (something that happened during the touch match during the day which i am much too sore abt to write it down! hahas) but anyway i've gotten over it and this sat (our last competition!:( )will definitely be a day to remember!!

Tuesday, June 1, 2004 11:21 p.m.

wahs....i had one hell of a bus ride home tdy after training! hahas..first..the air-con on the bus broke down, kept blowing hot air! and the bus really had to be so packed then! arrghs..nvm..then that stupid bus driver kept stopping to try and make the air con work! arrgshh..can't he just drive a bit faster and spare us the agony of staying on that bus a min longer? finally i couldn't take it anymore and i got off the nest stop. Then the next bus was so cold that the windows became so foggy and i missed my stop! all because i couldn't see a single shi*t! hahas..ah wells..lucky i realized it early if not gotta go and find another bus to bring me home which is so damn troublesome! arghs.hahas...but i guess this was nthg compared to the time when i changed 3 buses before i finally got the correct one! hahs and this happened to me more than once summore! damn..felt so embarrassed when i got off one stop after i got on and it was just on the other side of the MRT! hahas..ah wells..hope noone noticed! :)

Friday, May 28, 2004 12:45 a.m.

Friendship can fade away unnoticed/they don't last forever/who are true to you and who are not?/empty/life/empty/disappointment/sighs/superficial/nthg more than just having fun/end.

Monday, May 24, 2004 10:50 p.m.

We will emerge victorious once again!!
woo!! tmr's our game!!! wows...i'm feelling all excited but a bit nervous at the same time!! i know that all the other schs are so ready to beat us at all cost! BUT.. competition is gd! will spur us even more!! Hope that we can create the miracle we did on thurs!! EVERYONE dun forget how well we played on thurs!! We were on fire that day! (apart frm the shitty first 3 V 3 drill thoughs! hahahs) so let us all relax and have fun and show the rest the true hc touch spirit!

Friday, May 21, 2004 10:37 p.m.

Forgotten and free at last!
Free from everything at last! whee!i've finally got it all straightened out! These few months i've been feeling all knotty and screwed up inside buts now it's all clear! :)

Monday, May 17, 2004 09:44 p.m.

damn boring!!!now my ankle's all wrapped up and it stinks because of the chinese medicine! arrghh...had to go see sinseh yesterday coz suddenly my ankle ballooned and it looked like pig's trotters..:(now my ankle is no longer slim like it used to be!!!!!! :( *grins* ah well..can't even walk properly nows...sighs..guess it's my retribution for laughing at PP and zsing when their ankles were like this too!! hahahs..can't even go for training or dance tdy! feel like a pig coz all i do no is eat and sleep! ##$%^#^@^@$%. supposed to go adn watch troy today also!!! hmph. hmph. HMPH! now i'll have to miss brad pitt's abs(according to huishan they rock!) for another 3 days?!! HMPH! :)whcih brings me to think of the silly little bet of alan and chub..hahah...will they get 6 pacs by the end of may?!! hmmmmmmmm...

Saturday, May 15, 2004 11:14 a.m.

a curse
arrgh..i bloody twisted my ankle during napfa today!!! damnit. and after i managed to do 16 pullups (kinda faked my way through haha...the teacher was quite lenient!) ..my best numder yet!!!!! hmph....damn damn damn damn damn pissed with myself!!!!! for once i thought i can get past the 10th mark for my inclined..my cursed ankle..:( now i dunno who is gonna take my napfa for me next wk hope it's not alex tan..he damn strict! haha...like the everage for our shuttle run is 10. sthg.. (coz is mr loke wats!haha)then other classes who were timed by alex tan clocked an avg of 11. sthg to 12...sighs. ah wells. my 16 inlcones were never meant to be. haha.

Wednesday, May 12, 2004 11:47 p.m.

The First Touch Rugby DVD!
haha. watched our maiden DVD and it was quite amusing. i kept laughing to myself as i watched us in action at the RJC Touch Carnival 2004! How silly..:) All our glamour shots: us squeezing past 2 defenders and scoring(woah..), our magnificient dives where most of the time we ended up tumbling over ourselves(woah!), us outrunning our defenders(WOAH!)haha...and of coz the not-so-glam times..:) Lynn flicking her hair, Fareena's victory pose when she scores ie. kneeling position with 2 hands up, my 20 seconds of "fame" posing by the sidelines(haha!), joyce's bimbo run, our wobbly butts when we do our warm up run, and not to forget the last "hwa chong chiobus!" at the end when we pose for a pic (karen's idea if i remembered! haha) etc etc..ooo..and also the way karen was SCRUBBING at Mildrid's bloody, badly grazed kneeS, wahs...shld have seen the way she was rubbing at it! reminded me of my maid scrubbing clothes against the washboard..:) Remembered how we were all exclaiming at the sides, feeling all so painful for poor Mildrid! haha..if i were her, i would have took off as far as i could!

Wish we could have more of such DVDs.. really brings back sweet memories of our matches, all the blood, sweat and tears..:)i will surely remember all these happy times..

Saturday, May 8, 2004 09:38 p.m.

Van Helsing!
wat an action packed film! haha..and i can't believe that i actually watched it twice in 2 days!!! mans..all that bimbo's fault! hahas..ah well wat can i say, i was NICE enough to accompany her to watch it! hehe..:) met huishan zsing and chris at lido and they were gonna watch the same show as us too!!!! we sat at the same row summore..:)hahas..but it wasn't as exciting as yesterday since i anticipated all the "shocking" parts..instead i found parts of it rather amusing..and not to mention silly stuff (as usual) that happened in the theatre which is simply too too silly to write it down! :) haha..i actually jumped twice in my seat when i watched it yesterday!! mans..so irritating lahs!once when that mr hyde creature suddenly popped out from abpve and once when one of the shit dracula's bride appear frm nowhere! haiys..think its got sthg to do with the person i was sitting beside too lahs..(which by the way is dearest ade!) haha. my shrt was almost ripped off by her! gee..:)

haiys sports day was rather boring..and i bloody got up at 6.30 a.m summore..:( went to sch to realize only 3 of us were there..sum of the guys came and left even be4 flag raising! sighs..then leave me, wen hooi and poor ailian stuck there for like 4 hrs doing nthg! sian sian waste my precious time when i could have used it to sleep!! damnit. haha..ah wells..shld be ther and giv our sch sum moral support lahs (hah.since when have i become so loyal?!!! :)

oh yahs!! mother's day tmr!!! everyone go get your presents ready!! haha i'm proud to announce that i have already bought mine!! :)

Saturday, May 8, 2004 07:25 p.m.

Argghs..curse that blasted plastic cockroach!! damnit. can't believe i was tricked!! hahas..well, was called up to do sum stinky chem qn on the board today and while i was away from my seat charb decided to place a bloody, irritaing damn freaking real plastic cockroach into my pencil box. But, when i got back and took out my pen from it i ddn't realize it was there. No thanks to huishan who suddenly said she wanted to borrow my calculator and being nice i din think further(which if i did i would have realized that she HAD a calculator herself there and then and din really make sense for her to borrow from me!$#%^&*!!@3 :) and wat happened after that was totally embarrassing. i saw the cursed cockroach and NATURALLY anyone would assume it was real! my reflex action upon seeing that THING was to jump up in my seat and let out a "wah...." hmm..to tell the truth..i was really frightened hehs!! haha..was momentarily shocked before i realized wat had happened!!hmph. but come to think of it now, it was quite hilarious lahs..:) the same thing happened to me a couple of days ago when shiping and lilian placed a spider (10 times smaller thatn that THING summore! arrrghs) on my desk and when i turned around........................haiys..guess wat happened after that? hah. i m gonna be haunted by this 2 incidents 4 a few days.....hahha..

Tuesday, May 4, 2004 12:03 a.m.

haha...it's been a bloody long time since i came online..got quite a shock when i found out that my keyboard had turned dusty too!! haha...ah well..i'm just too lazy lahs..plus i've been so busy with sch stuff cca blah blah blah(excuses and excuses...:P) anyway hopefully i would have the modd to go revamp my blog very soon!! haha...

my trip to sch this morning was quite different frm the rest. 1. was walking to the bus stop listening to the radio at full blast when i heard this really REALLY REALLY lound "errrrrhem!!!!" behind me. i turned around and realized that this guy glaring at me. haha..trealized that it was coz i was kinda blocking his way that's y he cleared his throat in a horribly loud way to make sure i heard it.(BECOZ the pathway was narrow :P)he must have used quite a lot of strength coz it's amazing how i managed to hear him through my earphones!haha... 2. at the bus stop, this primary sch girl as tall as my waist tripped over my shoe. wat was scary was wat happened after that. she actually turned around and gave me the most murderous look i've ever seen a kid like her did.wahs..wat has happened to innocent and sweet and cute?

bleahs..haate the weather tdy..suppose to go NYJC for sum friendly tdy then it rained!!! and it only started POURING hwne we got ther somemore!!!! *fumes* so irritating!AH WELLS...in the end, we only played frisbee there...arrghss...sighs..sickening weather..ohs! hahas...i remembered something that vivien said abt my blog tdy! hahas..i din realize until she told me that..so far my "recent" entries has been abt rugby and nothing else~!!!! hahaha...

ohs!!1 i wanna watch "dawn of the dead"!!! but noone wants to watch it!!!! hmph!it's all my teammates fault! all of u dun dare to watch...hmph!so irritatingS..someone watch it with me lehs...hahhas...whoever's interested pls contact me! hah.

Thursday, April 29, 2004 11:19 p.m.

Rugby Sevens!!!
wahs...today the touch team went to watch the Singapore rugby sevens game and it was so exciting! esp the final game btw south africa and argentina ehs! they went into a sudden death situation and so many a times argentina almost scored the winning try! my heart almost stopped a couple of times when it seems as though argentina was the winner because there were a couple of times when it SEEMS as though someone frm their side broke thru and made a beeline for the try line but luck was on the south africans' side and finally after much "trials and tribulations" (haha) they managed to beat argentina!yay! i esp love to see the part when someone breaks thru a whole bunch of people trying to tackle him and run across the field to his try line and score a try! the crowd goes bersek whenever someone does that! it's so fun watching a rugby match! :)

ohs... we realized that most of the team we supported normally loses the match! haha..it was kinda wierd ehs! so we decided that we shld support the other teamn instead so that the team that we wanted to support in the first place would win it! haha..so silly of us..haiyas.. the All Blacks team didn't win anything tonight!! sighs..so disappointing lahs!! :( but still..they are my favourite favourite favourite rugby teamn arnd!! hahas..:)

ohs! and we got into this water gun fight with the clowns who were parading around the stadium!! haha! it was damn funny coz i think the reason why they suddenly "attacked" us was beacuse they thought maddy was going to shoot them with her water gun when she just accidentally point it in their direction! haha...we couldn't take it lying down so we decided to fight back and the next tiem round when the clowns came back they attacked them with their water bottles and the pathetic water gun that was given to them by the council nominees! haha..needless to say, we were beaten hands down coz their water guns are like 10 times the size of ours! hahas..

the weather let us down today though.it started to pour heavily halfway and everyone had to scramble for ponchos and umbrellas! ohs..and i was damn pissed off by this grp of ppl behind us who kept splashing water onto the crowd below them, and poor us who were sitting right in front of them kept getting caught in the crossfire between them and crowd below us!! sighs...we were so so innocent!

Sunday, April 4, 2004 11:00 p.m.

my diary
wahs...i think i damn smart...went to hide my diary so that my pesky brother won't sneak arnd and read it but now i can't remember where i last hid it!!! damnit. :) ah well...i am sure it will turn up eventually!! haha..maybe if i dun go and look for it i might chance upon it very soon..hmmm..:) haha..juz found out today that my brother used to "steal" my diary and read it when we were younger, it was kinda his "personal triumph"!!! haha..he still smugly claimed that it was his daily routine!!!!! *fumes* sighs....brothers...:)ohohoh!!!! i missed my show!! resident evil!! damn...going to watch it nows..but i will miss like 45 mins of it!arrgghh...:)

Friday, March 19, 2004 11:00 p.m.

Have you ever felt so helpless about not being able to do anything for a person before?

If there is one thing i learnt, that is to cherish the people around you. Never wait till it's too late late to tell them how much they mean to you. I might sound a little shallow to you but i used to think that my life was just about getting into uni, study hard, get a good career, marry, yada yada..until i realised that things might not turn out the way i expect them to be. There is so much more to life than what i initially thought it to be. watever. i sound quite preachy. argh. heck.

Thursday, March 18, 2004 11:35 p.m.

wahs wahs WAHS!!!!! hcjc touch rugby team rocks mans!!!haha..know i'm a BIT slow in blogging this.. afterall we won the "nationals" last thurs!! wahsss....it was damn exciting mans!! especially the finals!!! towards the last 10 mins, my heart almost died from all the excitement!!! we were losing for the first round then miraculously we bounced back at the 2nd round and won the championship!!!!! arghhss!!!! i cried lehs when the last whistle was blown!!! hahaha...wat a wimp mans...but i couldn't really be bothered lahs!!! FINALLY~!!! after like how long!!! haha...It was really a dream come true for all of us!! :):) *hahha..my teammates' gonna laugh when they read my blog!!*
this morning i went up on stage with joyce to say the speech...wahs..i said the name of our vice-principal wrongly!! ah ah ah!!! wat a blunder mans...hahahahHAHA...ah wells...almost couldn't contain my laughter this morning!! aiyas...all that joyce's fault!! she went to say the "hcjc monster" part!!! aiyas....:P oh...and i really REALLY muz muz clarify this!!! i AM NOT THE HCJC MONSTER!!!!!! arrghs...everyone kept asking me that lahs!!! wah laos....:) i not so strong on the field lahs...it's fareena!!! haha...i damn gentle kays...*gags*anyways...i wanna say a BEEEG "THANK YOU" to lilians n shiping for cuming down so early and helping us move our bags when it rained!! u guys are simply the best!! muahaha.. and also to bernard and zhengnans and his other half (hehehehe) and chin siong for cuming down to support ME!! *I HOPE* i din disappoint u all coz i scored a try in front of u all too!! wahahahahssshaha..:)

Monday, February 23, 2004 10:01 p.m.

YAY!! FINALLY!!! our 1st ever victory!!!! haha...even though it was only the rjc touch carnival, but we really wanted to win it to prove our worth after a disappointing defeat last yr!! willl NEVER forget it mans...when we won the finals...we were simply ecstatic!! haha...went arnd hugging each other and feeling so happy for one another! :) really hope that this wun be our 1st and last win though!!! i foresee many more good news for us!!

funny, i din feel as happy as i though i would be..perhaps is coz the more impt match is coming up REAL soon and it is that particular match that i think all of us really want to win! hmm...next 1 1/2 wks gonna be crucial and i really really really hope that my bloody ankle wun give me any more probs!!! *please please please* last yr liaos...dun wanna have any regrets!! so *prays very hard* pls let my ankle be well and gd or at least hold strong until after our match!! so train hard everyone!! leave no regrets on the field!! :)

Tuesday, February 3, 2004 12:03 a.m.

YAY!! FINALLY!!! our 1st ever victory!!!! haha...even though it was only the rjc touch carnival, but we really wanted to win it to prove our worth after a disappointing defeat last yr!! willl NEVER forget it mans...when we won the finals...we were simply ecstatic!! haha...went arnd hugging each other and feeling so happy for one another! :%

Monday, February 2, 2004 11:48 p.m.

does anyone wanna donate a feet?
haha...i twisted my blooody feet for the hundredth time today!!!!!! sians...just barely 2 days after i twisted it summore...really got nthg to say..hahhaha.. i think training sessions are pretty gd nowadays,always look forward to touch trainings!!(haha..realised that i go to sch more for my cca and friends than studies!!) hopefully we can be like that when we go for competition! last yr's lost was really a shame, but this yr willl not be the same!! we are so gonna win the upcoming matches, big or small!!:) buts...there are sum things that happened lately that i felt quite sad abt,training used to be more fun with more ppl arnd, think sum ppl will understand wat i mean..still, take care guys!! be missing u and cum back soon!!

hahahaha...chinese new yr tmr but i dun feeel anything at all. maybe i am old liaos....but anyways....happy chinese new yr to all!

Tuesday, January 20, 2004 11:31 p.m.

it is wierd how memories of my past yr in hwa chong suddenly came to mind as i flipped through sum of the phtos that i took with the claz or senior claz for the past yr. first 3 mths was exceptionally memorable, can't exactly pt out y though..hmm..maybe it was more fun back then..can't imagine wat life would be like next yr though, without our seniors, will really really really really miss them!!!!

Sunday, December 28, 2003 04:22 p.m.

Christina Aguilera - Stripped - lyrics


When they push, when they pull
Tell me can you hold on
When they say you should change
Can you lift your head high and stay strong

Will you give up, give in
When your heart's crying out "that is wrong"
Will you love you for you at the end of it all

Now in life there's gonna be times
When you're feeling low
And in your mind insecurities seem to take control
We start to look outside ourselves
For acceptance and approval
We keep forgetting that the one thing we should know is
Don't be scared

To fly alone
Find a path that is your own
Love will open every door

See in your hands the world is yours
Don't hold back and always know
All the answers you will unfold
What are you waiting for
Spread your wings and soar
The boy who wonders, is he good enough for them
Keep trying to please them all
But he just never seems to fit in
Then there's the girl who thinks she'll never ever be
Good enough for him
He's trying to change and
That's a game she'll never win

Sunday, December 28, 2003 04:17 p.m.

the funny feelingS inside me
I've been running away all my life. perhaps i feel it especially now because of all the changes that is happening in my life. i've been reflecting a lot on my life and wat is it that i really want to do next time or how i am gonna lead my life when sch reopens. seriously i am afraid of wat is gonna happen when the new yr begins. My results is my greates worry and yet i am not even attempting to start revision, simply because i am running away frm it. Afraid to face it and face watever hardship that i have to go through in order to regain the glory in my studies that i once had. sighs, my confidence weakens as the days pass and i dread to think where i will end up in in the future. i am being such a pessimist!! sighs. watever.one week left and nthg is done. well done charlene. may u be the last in claz next yr.

Friday, December 26, 2003 12:39 p.m.

bush dance rock!!!!
heyo! time now is 12 p.m an it is day 5 of the science summer school programme!!! yup..i relized jst last night or rather according to qiaomei and huishan that i talk in my sleep!haha..i guess most ppl have weid sleeping habits just that we dun know only!! hehe..
anyway...i am finding so hard to kep awak during lectures! daaamn....hhehe...i am so used to dozing of during lectures back in hwa chong that i am finding hard to keep awake during the day! arrghh...:p but i think lectures here are much interesting than in how chong!! at least they did some interesting experiments here and there and we would have never got to see them back in hwa chong! haha..maybe then my interest for science would b better uhhz...hehe...but the experiments her are not so fun though..was thinking maybe we could do some mixing of chemicals an blow up the lab..ya know..along that line!! hhe..
we had bush dance yesterday and it was soooooo fun!!! everyone was so high and everything and got so dizzy from spinning around! ahaha....think that is the only ime i really exercised though...hmmmmmmmm.....i miss touch!!!!!!! :p all th fats that i would have oherwise burned out................:) yay! going to ace high ranch tmr!!it is like sum camping trip for 3 days!! yayayayay! we are goin horseriding!!!!! yup! :) and other fun stuff i bet,all the water activities etc etc.. and campfie night!!! yay!! i love campfire nights!!!! the only bad thing abt it is we have to lug lotsa stuff there, like our bedsheets and stuff..arrrghh....but stilll........:) there are no cute guys here!!!! at least not very cute ones...hmmmm....hahaha...

Friday, December 5, 2003 10:04 a.m.

science summer school prgramme
hey everyone!!!!! i miss u guys so much!! (whoever that might be!!!!!!) arrghh...thoday is day 3 of the science programme and i am having so much fun!!! haha...but i still miss everything in singapore!:) geez...i manage to go online today and i already have so much to say! ahaha...hmm..where shall i start...yes...shall start with the day of arrival!! haha..we arrived at 9 in the nite and went straight to trinity college...and it is all creepy and stuff coz the buildings are preety old, but they have lovely old chapel!!
my room is quite ancient..the floorboards creaks and there is a scary fireplace that is super dark...haha..i was too scared to sleep alone an that's y ended up bunking in with qiaomei :) arghh..shall stop here first..gotta go!! hehe....ciao!!

Wednesday, December 3, 2003 02:35 p.m.

Touch Rugby Rocks!!
sighs..it is getting harder and harder to blog..because nothing interesting has been happening to me but then again i am bursting with stuff to say, stuff that cannot be blogged!!!!! gee...

anyways, i went to watch wontoks play today ..and all i can say is they are very very good!! hee..and 3 cheers to karen! she is such a good player that everytime she gets down and play a try is always scored! wows..haha..i also want to be like her! hehe..:) watching them score triggered off this sudden urge to win the match next sat! hopefully we can get to the finals because i really dun want to see the disappointment on karen or our faces! It sucks to train for so long and so hard and yet we dun win anything! Let's all train hard ruggerS and bring the champion trophy back home in glory! WAHAHAHA...sounds as if we are going to war or something! hehe...:)

Saturday, November 1, 2003 07:09 p.m.

Changes in life
i personally hate changes. It messes up my life and disrupts the pace of my life. Hmm..anyway..these few days has been especially shitty..esp after i learnt that i got 4 Os (THANKFULLY after that i gto 1 E frm math). Sounds a bit ridiculous but then i felt as if doomsday had come. Can't be helped, i mean i'd never gotten such lousy results be4 and i didn't think i would do so badly! (ok, maybe i overestimate myself! haha..) anyways..it was quite bad to cry in front of so so many ppl and i did that twice! gee...actually i tried very hard to control the tears coz i wanted to rush to the toilet and let it all out at one time but then everyone came and comfort me then suddenly..woosh..all the tears just kept flowing and flowing and flowing!! arrghh..so paiseh! haha...hmmm...but it is nice to have frends around u when u cry..i suddenly felt quite important lehs! haha..but thanks anyways! luv u guys! haha yucks..:D

but i am so glad that it is sunshine after the rain..lalala..even though i hafta drop subs :/ but still..hey, but maybe i will get 3 As for my A level! muahahahahaha...

Tuesday, October 28, 2003 11:58 p.m.

today we went to sentosa for training and i conclude it is not the place for training! haha..all the time i kept thinking abt going to the beach and play but then by the time we finish training i was so tired that i didn't felt like going anymore! damn..haha..it was still fun in any case! i mean just going out with the touch rugby ppl is quite fun because we talked lotsa crap, did silly things, esp at Yoshinoya! haha..it's SO amazing how 4 girls, me, huiqing, jingjun and dawn can talk abt anything under the sun, from palmistry to ambulances to SMSs.. nothing links to anything at all! haha..girls..
lets go to Sentosa again! but this time lets just got there to play! :D

Friday, October 24, 2003 07:49 p.m.

Charlene's EXCLUSIVE list of things to do after promos!!
1. Find a huge nice box to dump all my lecture notes, tutorials, and any school related stuff(including my pencil box) i never want to see u guys again until next year thank you very much!
2. shed some FATS
3. go SHOPPING!!yay yay yay!!
4. meet up wif friends that i missed soooo much during this period!
5. slack around and watch TV!!
6. EAT :D(i know this contradicts with pt 2 but i need some good food because i can't seem to eat happily because the picture of my notes kept appearing in the chicken.)
7. find nice books to read
9. sleep without having to dream about exam related stuff!:D
10. go to the beach!

Monday, October 6, 2003 01:11 p.m.

it scares me to know that everyone must be mugging super hard at home.
It scares me to think that a lot of people are aiming for S papers and their As and Bs while i am only contented to pass.
It scares me to know that promos is only 2 days away and i still have tons to clear up.
I am suddenly afraid. Afraid of not only the promos but other stuff. Stuff that keeps haunting me in the wierdest hours.

i find solace in music nowadays. However, all that it gives me is merely a fake sense of consolation coz at the end of the day, i know i have to face the cruel reality.

Monday, October 6, 2003 02:49 a.m.

hahaha..suddenly thought of the thong song..reminded me of the time when i was in the library with sinhui trying to study and i sang this song pretty loudly i guess because according to sinhui, the ppl at the next table turned to stare! hahahahaha...the worse thing was.........i was only singing "thong thong thong thong thong" over and over again coz that's the only phrase i knew!haha..ah well, not my fault that i usually only know like 2-3 sentences out of songs i know!

Friday, October 3, 2003 11:25 p.m.

it is often the little things in life that make the difference.

i opened the gate for a little girl to walk past today and to my surprise she turned back to say "thank you!" and gave me the sweetest and most innocent smile i had ever seen. That touched my heart greatly and i was pretty surprised at my own sudden outburst of happiness. Amazing how just one smile can make my day!

i am oh so determined to study hard for my promos now! muahahaha....

Friday, October 3, 2003 06:16 p.m.

May i just isolate myself from everything and everyone so that i can study in peace and hopfully pass my promos so that i do not have to drop subjects or get retained. Yes, u heard me. i want to be a hermit.

it's AMAZING how determined i was just 2 months back to strive to obtain much better grades than my block test since i seriously screwed that one up. here i am, 2 months later, trying to cramp last minute work into my head. sthg which rarely happens to me. i have NEVER felt so lost in my entire life while preparing for a bloody test. now, i can only hope that i manage not to fail too badly for my subjects or else i can really say goodbye to my present claz.

i conclude. life sucks.

Friday, October 3, 2003 01:15 a.m.

The world's NO. 1 dad
i would like to dedicate this entry to my father who has done lots and lots for me. Thank you.

Sunday, September 21, 2003 04:24 p.m.

i can't wait for promos to be over. STRESS.

Thursday, September 18, 2003 10:12 p.m.

i seriously recommend "panadol, twice as fast" to all those who have splititng headaches so pain that they thought they might-as-well-die that kind..works within 5 mins! haha..or maybe it was just all in the mind..hah!

was reading eline's blog and i realized how we muz muz muz cherish what we have(not that i am not but it din hit me as so strongly until now) suddenly i am overwhelmed with emotions right now. scary thoughts about my promos-whether i will panic again and totally blank out, thoughts about me getting retained, or if i am lucky enough and only need to drop subjects..shit. i hate this. and to think my horoscope actually said that i will "straightened my thoughts out and see the light in my life again", sighs. it's funny how a lot of ppl only believe in the positive things they say in ur horoscope.

in any case, take care dear, even if u dun get to see this but i sincerely hope that things will turn out better for ya!

Friday, September 12, 2003 12:37 a.m.

It's amazing how you speak right to my heart ,
With out saying a word you could light up the dark ,
Try as i may i could never explain,
What i hear when i don't say a thing .

The smile on your face let me knowthat you need me ,
There's a truth in your eyes saying you'll never leave me ,
The touch of your hands says you'll never leave me ,
The touch of your hand says you'll catch me wherever i fall ,
You say it best when you say nothing at all ,

All day long i can hear people talking aloud ,
But when you hold me near ,You drown out the crowd ,
Try as they may ,They could never define,
What's being said between your heart and mine

Monday, September 8, 2003 10:00 p.m.

morning horror
"look!" i turned my head and to my horror, i saw tons of firemen gathering at the bottom of the block beside mine with a huge inflated airbag! then i saw two of them absailing down to a unit and saw a girl ran from one window to another, ready to jump off the building..next thing i know, the firemen below were shouting and trying to shift the air bag so the new postition so that it could catch the girl..it was like a scene out of a movie! oh man..what in the world could have caused the poor girl to want to jump off the building? luckily the firemen caught her before she could jump or else it would have been terrible..

Sunday, September 7, 2003 11:35 a.m.

The pirates of the Caribbean
hah..i like the character jack sparrow (if that is how his name is spelt) in the show..super funny..reminds me a bit of the xie shao guang in holland v! I don't think there are any pirates now, is there? hmm...really love to see one! hehe..
how i yearn to see the day where my prince charming will come and rescue me..sigh...*dreams away*

Sunday, September 7, 2003 01:42 a.m.

a brand new page
love this template!

Saturday, September 6, 2003 06:46 p.m.

A tale of one very freaked out girl
"ah...shit it! shit it!"
"oh no...no no no!"
yup.. that's me. watching a tale of 2 sisters have made me conclude something. i really can't watch such shows coz it juz totally freaks me out! my hand was up covering my face 99% of the time and i kept screaming even though i din exactly see the full pic! haha..
ooo..but i so like the twist at the end!
went shopping with shiping after that and i found a pair of nice shoes! green somemore..if i really buy it, then i will be green frmm head to toe! simply love green!

Saturday, September 6, 2003 01:24 p.m.

Power Rangers Movie!

What movie Do you Belong in?(many different outcomes!)
brought to you by Quizilla

Saturday, September 6, 2003 12:09 p.m.

my 5 secs of fame
woah..was shocked at the no. of people who went to queue up for free preview tickets for the new film by jin cheng wu and gigi leung! the overhead bridge was so packed with people that i caould hardly move! sadly, i din manage to get any tickets..:/ oh well...my friend said that she could even see the bridge moving slightly! haha..

ooo..and i got interviewed! haha..but the thing is..i am camera shy lahs..so in a flurry, i din really exactly spoke the correct type of english..(haha..trying to explain for my poor english! :D) anyone watched channel news asia tonite? i was on air! for like 5 secs...haha..

Thursday, September 4, 2003 10:44 p.m.

song of the day
Ladies and gentlemen
It's my pleasure to introduce to you
He's a friend of mine
Yes, yes I am
And he goes by the name... (haha)

All the way
from Memphis, Tennessee
And he's got somethin' special for y'all tonight
He's gonna sing a song for y'all
About this girl

Come in right here? On that sunny day didn't know I'd meet,
Such a beautiful girl walking down the street
Seen those bright brown eyes
With tears coming down (so he said to himself)
She deserves a crown
But where is it now
Mama listen

Senorita, I feel for you
You deal with things, that you don't have to
He doesn't love ya, I can tell by his charm
But you could feel this real love
If you just lay in my

Running fast in my mind
Girl won't you slow it down
If we carry on this way this thing might leave the ground
How would you like to fly?
That's how my queen should ride But you still deserve a crown Well hasn't it been found?
Mama listen..


Ah, ah, arms...
(Won't you lay in my)
Ah, ah, arms...
(Mama lay in my)
Ah, ah, arms...
(Baby won't you lay in my)
Ah, ah, arms...

When I look into your eyes
I see something that money can't buy
And I know if you give us a try
I'll work hard for you girl
And no longer will you ever have to cry...


Ah, ah, arms...
Ah, ah, arms...
(My baby)
Ah, ah, arms...
(Oooh, yea)
Ah, ah, arms...

When I look into your eyes
I see something that money can't buy
And I know if you give us a try
I'll work hard for you girl
You won't ever cry
Now listen,
I wanna try some right now,
See they don't do this anymore.
I'ma sing something
And I want the guys to sing with me
They go:
"It feels like something's heating up, can I leave with you?"
And then the ladies go
"I don't know what I'm thinking bout, really leaving with you"
Guys sing!
It feels like something's heating up, can I leave with you? And ladies..
I don't know what I'm thinking bout, really leaving with you Feels good don't it? Come on
It feels like something's heating up, can I leave with you? Yea, ladies
I don't know what I'm thinking bout, really leaving with you Show the good to me
Sing it one more time It feels like something's heating up, can I leave with you? Ladies, I don't know what I'm thinking bout, really leaving with you Yea, yea.. It feels like something's heating up, can I leave with you? Ladies, I don't know what I'm thinking bout, really leaving with you Gentlemen, good night, Ladies, good morning That's it

Thursday, September 4, 2003 09:56 p.m.

miracle weight loss programme
wooow...i was momentarily stumped by what i saw on TV. There were 5 guys on screen and all of them were above 100 kg just 2 years back. but after a strict regime ofeating less and exercising, voila! they were skinny young lads! oh man....one even lost 50 kg in 2 years!!!! 50!! it's pretty amazing how one's looks can change for the better after losing weight, like woah.....after that programme, i suddenly felt a burning desire to go lose weight..i mean seriously..this time is for real (hopefully!) and to all the reasonably rounded people like me, there is still hope for us! :D

Monday, September 1, 2003 03:23 p.m.

a long lost frend
i never knew we could be such good frends during that 3 days..but after that, when we talked, i realized we could be pretty close..then i became too busy to keep in touch with you and we slowly drift away. what happened? i know u wanted to meet up but i was too busy at that time, and now........time waits for no man and a lost frendship can never be found again. Or can it? ......

Saturday, August 30, 2003 12:23 p.m.

arrrgghh...i just somehow lost all my previous entries!!!!!!!!$#@%@##$$........this is very very bad..

Thursday, August 28, 2003 12:33 a.m.

please link to http://www.fullmoongraphics.com/ for this set, using the matching link logo:


thanks, Kitty! you rock, chiquita!